Todd Flanders
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Quotes for
Todd Flanders (Character)
from "The Simpsons" (1989)

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The Simpsons Movie (2007)
Bart Simpson: I want a father who's the same in the morning as he is at night. Oh... what's that word...
Todd Flanders, Rod Flanders: Consistency?
Bart Simpson: Thanks losers.

Ned Flanders: Thank you, Lord, for this bountiful...
Ned Flanders: [screams]
Ned Flanders: PENIS!
Rod Flanders, Todd Flanders: [devoutly] ... bountiful penis.
Todd Flanders: Amen.

Ned Flanders: Ok, boys, when you meet Jesus, be sure to call Him Mr. Christ.
Todd Flanders: Will Buddha be there?
Ned Flanders: No.

Todd Flanders: I wish Homer was my father.
Ned Flanders: ...and I wish you didn't have the devil's curly hair.

"The Simpsons: My Sister, My Sitter (#8.17)" (1997)
[playing a religious board game]
Lisa Simpson: Where are the dice?
Todd Flanders: Daddy says dice are wicked.
Rod Flanders: We just move one space at a time. It's less fun that way.

"The Simpsons: Lisa's First Word (#4.10)" (1992)
Grandma Flanders: Hello, Joe!

"The Simpsons: Dude, Where's My Ranch? (#14.18)" (2003)
Homer Simpson, David Byrne: [singing] He's your peppy, perky, nightmare neighborino!
Homer Simpson: If you despise polite lefthanders...
Ned Flanders: [singing along] Then I doubt you'll like Ned Flanders, or his creepy little offspring Rod and Todd.
Rod Flanders: That's us.
Todd Flanders: Hooray!

"The Simpsons: Natural Born Kissers (#9.25)" (1998)
Grampa Simpson: Now you got her, Bart. Jump Lisa's king.
Rod Flanders: I'm not Bart. I'm Rod Flanders.
Grampa Simpson: There you go with that smart mouth! Lisa, run outside and cut me a switch.
Todd Flanders: Yes sir!

"The Simpsons: Bart Has Two Mommies (#17.14)" (2006)
Rod Flanders: Hurry, let's climb down.
Bart: Okay but don't let our hands touch. It's gay.
Rod Flanders: What's gay mean?
Bart: Uh, it means you use to be afraid
[brief pause]
Bart: , but now you're not.
Rod Flanders: [to his father Ned Flanders below] I'm gay Daddy... I'm gay! Mrs. Simpson made me gay.
Marge: [nervously to Ned Flanders] I believe he's saying... he's okay.

"The Simpsons: Bart Star (#9.6)" (1997)
Todd Flanders: We don't have to play football, do we, Daddy?1
Ned Flanders: Ho ho ho, you betcha. Team sports will keep you away from temptations like rock music and girls.
Rod Flanders, Todd Flanders: Yay!

"The Simpsons: 'Tis the Fifteenth Season (#15.7)" (2003)
Rod Flanders: Are you jealous of Brother Homer?
Ned Flanders: Maybe just a little bit.
Rod Flanders: I'm jealous of girls 'cause they get to wear dresses.
Ned Flanders: One problem at a time, boy.

"The Simpsons: The Front (#4.19)" (1993)
[the Adventures of Ned Flanders: Love That God]
Todd Flanders: We're not going to church today!
Ned Flanders: *What*? You give me one good reason!
Todd Flanders: It's Saturday!
Ned Flanders: Okely-dokely-doo!