Magic Mirror
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Quotes for
Magic Mirror (Character)
from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)

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DTV Monster Hits (1987) (TV)
Man in the Magic Mirror: Oh, good, she's not here. I mean, my former employer... the Wicked Queen in Snow White, you know - "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" Yecch.

Man in the Magic Mirror: It's fifty years since I first appeared on the silver screen. Back then, "rock" had a different meaning. We'd beware of rocks, especially if they were rolling.

Man in the Magic Mirror: Tonight, we'll share some slightly scary monster hits from the dungeons of Disney. Delicious little things that go BUMP in the night.

Man in the Magic Mirror: Pure fear can be so exhilarating. It sometimes even makes me feel like dancing, but - I can't. Because, as the song goes, I ain't got no body.

Man in the Magic Mirror: I've been hanging around for centuries, so I've had plenty of time for reflection of the most interesting of subjects: villains. Do you realice that without evil there is no good, and without villains there wouldn't be heroes? Believe me, I'm an expert. Being a looking-glass, I get to watch all kinds of people so don't be surprised if the next time you look into a mirror, somebody's watching you.

Man in the Magic Mirror: [of The Legend of Sleepy Hollow] Is this story real, or mere fantasy?... I'll never tell. But that pie was delicious!

Man in the Magic Mirror: When it comes to scheming, plotting, and revenge, heck hath no fury like a woman scorned and I should know. Used to work for one of the unfairest of all.

Man in the Magic Mirror: She loved to dabble in her lab and consult her cookbook of spells and curses. Remember her motto - bitter living through chemistry?

Man in the Magic Mirror: [Medusa shoots him] Hey, wait a minute, what's going on here! I'm on *your* side! Hoh! This hosting job can be a danerous experience.

Man in the Magic Mirror: You know what strikes me as you humans' greatest weakness? Superstitions. I mean, does anyone honestly believe that nonsense about a black cat bringing bad luck, or, that thirteen at dinner causes indigestion? It's so ridiculous. In fact, just the other day -
[a fissure etches its way onto his glass]
Man in the Magic Mirror: Who did that? Who cracked my mirror? Oh, curses, don't you know that's seven years' bad luck? For you!

Man in the Magic Mirror: If I had beautiful dreams like Mickey, I'd go back to sleep too. Of course, I must admit I personally perfer nightmares, but - don't be alarmed.

Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)
[from trailer]
Mirror Man: My queen, you have defied nature and robbed it of its fairest root. But on this day there is one more beautiful than you.
Queen Ravenna: Who is it?
Mirror Man: Snow White.

Mirror Man: Snow White. She is the reason your powers wane.

Mirror Man: Is there no end to your power and beauty?

Queen Ravenna: Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who is fairest of them all?
Mirror Man: My Queen, on this day one has come of age fairer even than you. She is the reason your powers wane.
Queen Ravenna: Who is it?
Mirror Man: Snow White.
Queen Ravenna: Snow White? She is my undoing? I should have killed her when she was a child!
Mirror Man: Be warned, her innocence and purity is all that can destroy you. But she is also your salvation, Queen. Take her heart in your hand and you shall never again need to consume youth. You shall never again weaken or age.
Queen Ravenna: Immortality. Immortality forever.
Queen Ravenna: Finn! Brother, bring me the King's daughter.

"Once Upon a Time: Fruit of the Poisonous Tree (#1.11)" (2012)
Sidney Glass: I can grant your wish.

Sidney Glass: You wanna show this town who the mayor really is? I can help.
Emma Swan: It's gonna be kinda hard to do from inside her pocket.

Sidney Glass: Sometimes doing a bad thing for a good reason is OK, right?
Mary Margaret Blanchard: Yeah. I mean, maybe you're doing something wrong, but if it's what's meant to be, if it's what's right, does that really make you a bad person?

Sidney Glass: [referring to Regina] Well, if you can't beat her... drink.

"The Charmings: The Witch Is of Van Oaks (#2.3)" (1987)
The Mirror: They just want to see you happy.
Queen Lillian White: Then they should spontaneously combust!

The Mirror: You may think you're hot stuff, but you're taking Lillian to Hell over my dead body!
Jack: Okey-doke.
The Mirror: Let me rephrase that.

Queen Lillian White: Mirror, mirror, let's get down. Who's the hottest witch in town?
The Mirror: Hey! Not while I'm eating.

"The Charmings: Modern Romance (#1.3)" (1987)
The Mirror: Who'd want to go out with you?
Queen Lillian White: Who wouldn't? I'm beautiful, cultured, interesting...
The Mirror: You poison people.
Queen Lillian White: Tell me that's not interesting!

The Mirror: Confidence is the only thing that stands between a man who succeeds and one who is defeated before he starts.

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)
[first lines]
Queen: Slave in the magic mirror, come from the farthest space, through wind and darkness I summon thee. Speak! Let me see thy face.
Magic Mirror: What wouldst thou know, my Queen?
Queen: Magic mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?
Magic Mirror: Famed is thy beauty, Majesty. But hold, a lovely maid I see. Rags cannot hide her gentle grace. Alas, she is more fair than thee.
Queen: Alas for her! Reveal her name.
Magic Mirror: Lips red as the rose. Hair black as ebony. Skin white as snow.
Queen: Snow White!

Queen: Magic Mirror, on the wall, who, now, is the fairest one of all?
Magic Mirror: Over the seven jewelled hills, beyond the seventh fall, in the cottage of the Seven Dwarfs, dwells Snow White, fairest of them all.
Queen: Snow White lies dead in the forest. The huntsman has brought me proof. Behold, her heart.
Magic Mirror: Snow White still lives, fairest in the land. 'Tis the heart of a pig you hold in your hand.
Queen: The heart of a pig! Then I've been tricked!

"The Charmings: Incredible Shrinking Prince (#1.5)" (1987)
Queen Lillian White: Well, I've got to find a way to make some money. I couldn't find the goose that lays the golden eggs, I can't spin straw into gold - and where's Midas when you need him?
The Mirror: Selling mufflers.

The Mirror: [Lillian conjures up counterfeit cash] Lillian, this is not what I meant when I said you should make some money.
Queen Lillian White: What do you think?
The Mirror: [the mirror studies a bill] Hmmmm... Well, for starters it should be George Washington or Alexander Hamilton, not George Hamilton!

"Faerie Tale Theatre: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (#3.5)" (1984)
[first lines]
The Magic Mirror: Once upon a time, in a faraway land, with graceful forests and towering mountains, there lived a beautiful young queen. As well as being lovely, she was a warm person. And she and the king were very much in love. One day, as she was sewing a birthday gift for her husband, she pricked her finger with the needle.
Snow White's Mother: [pricking her finger, then gazing at the blood] Ooh... oh, how I wish I could have a child with lips a deep red.
[putting her pricked finger to her lips, then gazing out the window at the falling snow]
Snow White's Mother: And skin white as snow. And hair black as the wood on my window frame.

The Magic Mirror: Several months later, the young queen gave birth to a daughter, and everyone in the kingdom was very happy. But happier than everyone was the beautiful young queen. For her daughter was blessed with lips a deep red, and skin white as snow, and her hair was as black as the wood in the window frame. Discussing the matter with the king, they decided to call the baby Snow White. But all did not go well. The young queen died a short while later, and everyone in the land felt a very deep sadness. After several years, the king married once again. But the new queen, while very beautiful indeed, did not have the goodness in her heart that Snow White's mother possessed. She was mean and selfish and - very, very vain.

One Hour in Wonderland (1950) (TV)
Charlie McCarthy: Okay, magic boy, let's see who you really are.
Slave in the Magic Mirror: What is it, son of the sapling?
Charlie McCarthy: I'll ignore that.

Charlie McCarthy: [about the Magic Mirror] That's probably some kind of a hopped-up television set.
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Television?
Slave in the Magic Mirror: TELEVISION?
[Thunder crashes and lightning flashes inside the mirror; everyone gasps]
Walt Disney: Whoa! Steady, old boy! Take it easy.
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Television, ha! I have never been so insulted in all my unborn days.

"Walt Disney's Wonderful World of Color: Magic and Music (#4.22)" (1958)
Walt Disney: [Supposedly, millions of letters have been written by fans asking Disney to let the slave in the Magic Mirror host a show. Disney quotes one] Signed, Cigam Rorrim.
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Odd name!
Walt Disney: [holding the letter up to the mirror, ominously] What does it spell backwards?
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Magic Mirror?
Walt Disney: Well, you asked for it, old boy. As for these...
[he makes the letters disappear magically]
Walt Disney: Next time, old fellow, will you please use some scent on your letters besides brimstone? Well, on with the show!
[he leaves]
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Wise guy! Well, you heard what he said: on with the show! Music!

Slave in the Magic Mirror: Perhaps the most bewitching aspect of musical magic is that every melodic theme has the mysterious power of conjuring up an image. We might say music is like a magic brush.
[conjures up a paintbrush that then paints the keys of a piano]
Slave in the Magic Mirror: It paints a picture.

The Walt Disney Christmas Show (1951) (TV)
Wendy: Oh Slave in the Mirror, come from the farthest space.
[a bolt of lightning flashes in the mirror]
Wendy: Through wind and rain I -
[she stops as he appears]
Slave in the Magic Mirror: I am *here*, young mistress.
Wendy: Oh my goodness you got here in a hurry. I didn't get to finish the magic words.
Slave in the Magic Mirror: Well it so happened that I was *in* the neighborhood.

Shrek 2 (2004)
Mirror: Well, the abs are fab and it's gluteus to the maximus here at the Far Far Away royal ball. The carriages are all lined up as the cream of the crop pours out of them like Miss Muffet's curds and whey.

"The Monkees: I Was a Teenage Monster (#1.18)" (1967)
Dr. Mendoza: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the evilest one of all?
The Magic Mirror: Dr. Carl Shweibel of Dusseldorf, Germany.
Dr. Mendoza: But I thought it was me!
The Magic Mirror: You're only second best. You'll have to try harder. And don't yell at me, I only work here.

"The Charmings: The Man Who Came to Dinner (#2.13)" (1988)
The Mirror: [Lillian enters her magic spells into the computer] You're gonna throw away your book and trust your spells to that machine?
Queen Lillian White: Why not? It has spell-check!

"The Charmings: The Mirror Cracked (#1.2)" (1987)
[When a juggler throws balls into the air, Lillian magically makes them vanish]
The Mirror: Lillian, give the nice man his balls back!

"Once Upon a Time: Lost Girl (#3.2)" (2013)
Magic Mirror: Careful! If you drop me, I'll make sure you have *14* years bad luck.

"The Charmings: The Charming's Buy a Car (#1.4)" (1987)
Snow White Charming: Now, what would you have done in The Enchanted Forest, say, if peddler Tupper had cheated you?
Eric Charming: Well, he never would have. The town crier would have spread the word and no one would ever again buy Tupper's wares.
Queen Lillian White: Tupper's wares! I always hated his parties!
The Mirror: But the food was so fresh.

"Once Upon a Time: The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (#1.7)" (2011)
[first lines]
[Sheriff Graham is throwing darts at the image of a deer, hitting the target with the first two]
Sidney Glass: Nice shot, Chief. I bet you 20 bucks you can't do it again.
[Graham takes a sip from his drink and throws his third dart - full in the deer's face!]
Sheriff Graham: [to Ruby] Next round's on him.

"Once Upon a Time: Desperate Souls (#1.8)" (2012)
[Emma has criticized Regina's appointment of Sidney Glass as the new sheriff]
Regina Mills: The town charter clearly states, "The mayor shall appoint..."
Emma Swan: A candidate. You can appoint a candidate. It calls for an election.
Regina Mills: The term 'candidate' is applied loosely.
Emma Swan: No, it's not. It requires a vote. And guess what, Madam Mayor, I'm running.
Regina Mills: Fine. So is Sidney.
Sidney Glass: I am?
[Regina throws him a look]
Sidney Glass: I am.

"The Charmings: The Charmings Go Plastic (#2.2)" (1987)
Queen Lillian White: Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest of them all? Mirror! I know you're in there!
The Mirror: Give it a rest, Lillian! I'm trying to plan a little vacation here yet you persist in asking me this same stupid question over and over and over and over! Don't you ever get tired of it?
Queen Lillian White: No.
The Mirror: Okay, you want to know who's fairer than you?
[Picks up phone book]
The Mirror: Now, this is just the greater Los Angeles area...