Pat Riley
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Quotes for
Pat Riley (Character)
from It's Pat (1994)

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It's Pat (1994)
Hood: So, what we wanna know is are you a brotha or a sista?
Pat: Well, I'm an only child...

[Pat falls down a flight of stairs]
Kyle Jacobs: Are you all right... um... um... you there?
Chris: Yeah, hon. Did you break anything?
Pat Riley: Oh, I crushed my nuts!
Kyle Jacobs: Ooooh, that's got to hurt!
Pat Riley: Oh, shoot!
[holding up crushed walnuts]
Pat Riley: There goes my afternoon snack!

Pat Riley: Howdy, Tippy!
Tippy: Oh... oh Pat... what do you want?
Pat Riley: Well I just thought I'd stop by and pick up a few personal items.
Tippy: Oh no no no, please, remember? No, I don't want to know anything about your... your sex life, okay?
Pat Riley: I just want to get a few toiletries. Uh, first of all, I need some protection...
Tippy: Oh dear God, okay, all right.
Pat Riley: ...from underarm wetness. I'm never one to offend!
Tippy: 2.50 then, all right, and you're out...
Pat Riley: What am I, in a race? Whoa!
Tippy: Well, kind of, uh...
Pat Riley: And I need a lubricant...
Tippy: What?
Pat Riley: ...for my eyes. They're drying up due to the pollen and dust in the air.
Tippy: Oh great, help me, somebody please help me!
Pat Riley: And I need some feminine napkins...
Tippy: Oh, I'm in hell... I am in hell now!
Pat Riley: You never know when Aunt Wilma's gonna stop by for lunch!

Pat: I played with the Ween!

Chris: I find everything about you... endlessly fascinating.
Pat Riley: Join the club!

Groupie: You were great tonight, Pat.
Pat Riley: Oh, you thought so to?

Pat Riley: So... did I tell you I'm unemployed?
Kathy Griffin: Yea, uh, about 400 times.
Pat Riley: Say, do you think you could make an announcement about it at the radio station?
Kathy Griffin: Absolutely not.
Pat Riley: Ok, well think about it, but when you do make the announcement let me know. I want to tell my friends to tune in. They don't listen to your show normally.

Pat: Spekanse americano por favor?