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: It was a "Jump to Conclusions" mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor... and would have different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO. Michael Bolton
: That's the worst idea I've ever heard in my life, Tom. Samir
: Yes, this is horrible, this idea.
: Well-well look. I already told you: I deal with the god damn customers so the engineers don't have to. I have people skills; I am good at dealing with people. Can't you understand that? What the hell is wrong with you people?
: You think the pet rock was a really great idea? Tom Smykowski
: Sure it was. The guy made a million dollars. You know, I had an idea like that once. A long time ago. Peter Gibbons
: Really, what was it, Tom? Tom Smykowski
: Well, all right. It was a "Jump to Conclusions" mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor, and it would have different conclusions written on it that you could jump to.
: [Smykowski is in a full-body cast
] Just remember, if you hang in there long enough, good things can happen in this world. I mean, look at me.
: Tom, every week you say you're going to lose your job and you're still here. Tom Smykowski
: Not this time. I'll bet I'm the first one laid off! Just the thought of having to go to the state unemployment office and stand in line with those SCUMBAGS...