Federal Wildlife Marshal Willenholly
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Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)
Willenholly: Put the monkey down, and your hands up. Let's go, misters. Do you want to get shot? I didn't think so.
Jay: Look, man. She doesn't want to go back to the lab. And for the record, I ain't gay.
Willenholly: And for the record, while we're one the subject, I knew that wasn't a real little boy.
Jay: And for one more record, he does love the cock.

Willenholly: Oh my God. I'm paralyzed! That monkey shot me in the ass and paralyzed me! Oh sweet irony!
Justice: You're not paralyzed. It was just a tranquilizer.

Willenholly: [while masturbating to donkey / girl porn] Oh Yeah! Oh Yeah! You chug that ass cock, baby. You need two hands. Oh, you like that, MULE. Mules are... GOOD!