Quotes for
Indiana Jones (Character)
from Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

Indiana Jones: Archaeology is the search for fact... not truth. If it's truth you're looking for, Dr. Tyree's philosophy class is right down the hall.

Principal SS Officer at Castle: [the Nazis burst into the room] Dr. Jones?
Professor Henry Jones, Indiana Jones: Yes?
Principal SS Officer at Castle: I will take zuh book now.
Professor Henry Jones, Indiana Jones: Wuh-what b-book?
Principal SS Officer at Castle: You have zuh diary in your pocket.
Professor Henry Jones: You dolt! You think my son would be that stupid? That he would bring my diary all the way back here?
[pause]
Professor Henry Jones: You didn't, did you?
[another pause]
Professor Henry Jones: You didn't bring it, did you?
Indiana Jones: Well, uh...
Professor Henry Jones: You *did*!
Indiana Jones: Look, can we discuss this later?
Professor Henry Jones: I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers!
Indiana Jones: Will you take it easy?
Professor Henry Jones: Take it easy? Why do you think I sent it home in the first place? So it wouldn't fall into their hands!
Indiana Jones: I came here to SAVE you!
Professor Henry Jones: Oh, yeah? And who's gonna come to save you, JUNIOR?
Indiana Jones: [shouts] I *told* you...
Indiana Jones: [grabs a gun and shoots all soldiers dead]
Indiana Jones: ...DON'T call me Junior!
Professor Henry Jones: Look what you did! I can't *believe* what you did!

Professor Henry Jones: Junior?
Indiana Jones: Yes, sir.
Professor Henry Jones: It *is* you, Junior.
Indiana Jones: Don't call me that. *Please*.

[Encountering a painting of the Ark of the Covenant]
Elsa: What's this?
Indiana Jones: Ark of the Covenant.
Elsa: Are you sure?
Indiana Jones: Pretty sure.

Indiana Jones: Sallah, I said *no* camels. That's *five* camels. Can't you count?

Panama Hat: Small world, Dr. Jones.
Indiana Jones: Too small for two of us.
Panama Hat: This is the second time I've had to reclaim my property from you.
Indiana Jones: That belongs in a museum.
Panama Hat: So do you.

Professor Henry Jones: The quest for the grail is not archeology, it's a race against evil. If it is captured by the Nazis the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the earth. Do you understand me?
Indiana Jones: This is an obsession, Dad. I've never understood it. Never. Neither did Mom.
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yes she did. Only too well. Unfortunately, she kept her illness from me. All I could do was mourn her.

Elsa: [to Indy] I'll never forget how vonderful it vas.
Professor Henry Jones: Why thank you. It was rather wonderful.
Elsa: [kisses Indy] Zat's how Austrians say goodbye.
Colonel Vogel: Und zis is how ve zay goodbye in Germany, Dr. Jones.
[punches Indy with the head of his cane; Indy's head smacks into Henry's behind him]
Indiana Jones: I liked the Austrian way better.
Professor Henry Jones: So did I.

Professor Henry Jones: Those people are trying to kill us!
Indiana Jones: [shouts] I know, Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: This is a new experience for me.
Indiana Jones: It happens to me all the time.

Indiana Jones: Listen. Since I've met you I've nearly been incinerated, drowned, shot at, and chopped into fish bait. We're caught in the middle of something sinister here, my guess is dad found out more than he was looking for and until I'm sure, I'm going to continue to do things the way I think they should be done.

[after commandeering a plane]
Professor Henry Jones: I didn't know you could fly a plane.
Indiana Jones: Fly, yes. Land, no.

Indiana Jones: I'm like a bad penny, I always turn up.

[talking about how they both slept with the same woman]
Indiana Jones: It's disgraceful, you're old enough to be her... her grandfather.
Professor Henry Jones: Well, I'm as human as the next man.
Indiana Jones: Dad, I *was* the next man.
Professor Henry Jones: Oh... ships that pass in the night.

Professor Henry Jones: I'm sorry about your head though. But I thought that you were one of them.
Indiana Jones: Dad, they come in through the doors.
Professor Henry Jones: Ha, good point.

Indiana Jones: Nazis. I hate these guys.

Professor Henry Jones: Elsa never really believed in the grail. She thought she'd found a prize.
Indiana Jones: And what did you find, Dad?
Professor Henry Jones: Me? Illumination.

[last lines]
Marcus Brody: Indy, Henry, follow me. I know the way. Ha!
[Marcus' horse rides off with him barely hanging onto it]
Professor Henry Jones: Got lost in his own museum, eh?
Indiana Jones: Uh-huh.
Professor Henry Jones: After you, Junior.
Indiana Jones: Yes, sir. Ha!

[Indiana and Henry are tied up]
Indiana Jones: Come on, dad. Help me get us out of here. We have to get to Marcus before the Nazis do.
Professor Henry Jones: But you said he had a two day head start. That he would blend in, disappear.
Indiana Jones: Are you kidding? I made all that up. You know Marcus. He once got lost in his own museum.

[Lecturing in class]
Indiana Jones: "X" never, ever marks the spot.

[Finding a hidden passage in a Venetian library]
Indiana Jones: "X" marks the spot.

Professor Henry Jones: [Examining the broken vase] Late 14th Ming Dynasty. Oh it breaks the heart.
Indiana Jones: And the head. You hit me dad.
Professor Henry Jones: I'll never forgive myself.
Indiana Jones: Don't worry I'm all right.
Professor Henry Jones: Thank God... it's fake. See you can tell with the cross sections.

Elsa: It's perfectly obvious where the pages are. He's given them to Marcus Brody.
Professor Henry Jones: Marcus? You didn't drag poor Marcus along did you? He's not up to the challenge.
Walter Donovan: He sticks out like a sore thumb. We'll find him.
Indiana Jones: The hell you will. He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Brody's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.
[Cut to middle of fair in the Middle East, Marcus Brody wearing bright suit and white hat, sticking out like sore thumb]
Marcus Brody: Uhhh, does anyone here speak English?

Professor Henry Jones: Junior, I have tell you something.
Indiana Jones: Don't get sentimental now dad, save it until we get out of here.
Professor Henry Jones: The floor's on fire... see... AND the chair.

Indiana Jones: It was just the two of us, dad. It was a lonely way to grow up. For you, too. If you had been an ordinary, average father like the other guys' dads, you'd have understood that.
Professor Henry Jones: Actually, I was a wonderful father.
Indiana Jones: When?
Professor Henry Jones: Did I ever tell you to eat up? Go to bed? Wash your ears? Do your homework? No. I respected your privacy and I taught you self- reliance.
Indiana Jones: What you taught me was that I was less important to you than people who had been dead for five hundred years in another country. And I learned it so well that we've hardly spoken for twenty years.
Professor Henry Jones: You left just when you were becoming interesting.

Indiana Jones: [dressed as the ticket-taker] Tickets please.
Colonel Vogel: [in German] What?
[Indiana punches him, picks him up and throws him out a window into a pile of luggage; the other passengers look at him, bewildered]
Indiana Jones: [pointing out the window at Vogel] No ticket.

[Repeated line]
Indiana Jones: Ahh, Venice.

Professor Henry Jones: You say this has been just another typical day for you huh?
Indiana Jones: NO. It's been better than most.

Indiana Jones: [to his father] I was just remembering the last time we had a quiet drink together. I had a milkshake.

Indiana Jones: [of Indy's new lover] How did you know she was a Nazi?
Professor Henry Jones: She talks in her sleep.

[Vogel is holding Elsa hostage at gunpoint]
Colonel Vogel: Throw down the gun or the girl will die.
Professor Henry Jones: But she's one of them.
Elsa: Indy, please!
Professor Henry Jones: She's a Nazi.
Indiana Jones: What?
Professor Henry Jones: Trust me.
Elsa: Indy, help!
Colonel Vogel: I will kill her!
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yeah? Go ahead.
Indiana Jones: No! Don't shoot!
Professor Henry Jones: Don't worry. He won't.
Elsa: Indy, please do what he says!
Professor Henry Jones: And don't listen to her.
Colonel Vogel: Enough! She dies!
Indiana Jones: Wait! Wait.
[Indy tosses over the gun. Vogel lets Elsa go and she runs right into Indy's arms]
Elsa: I'm sorry.
Indiana Jones: Don't be.
[Elsa takes the grail diary from Indy's pocket, smiles, then hands it to Vogel]
Elsa: But you should have listened to your father.

Professor Henry Jones: The Word of God.
Marcus Brody: No, Henry. Try not to talk.
Professor Henry Jones: The Name of God.
Indiana Jones: The Name of God... Jehovah.
Professor Henry Jones: But in the Latin alphabet, "Jehovah" begins with an "I".
Indiana Jones: J-...
[he steps on the "J" and almost falls to his death; he scrambles back up]
Indiana Jones: Oh, *idiot*! In Latin Jehovah begins with an "I"!

Walter Donovan: Find the man and you'll find the Grail.
Indiana Jones: You've got the wrong Jones, Mr. Donovan. Why don't you try my father?
Walter Donovan: We already have. Your father is the man who has disappeared.

Elsa: You came back for the book? Why?
Indiana Jones: My father didn't want it incinerated.
Elsa: [angrily] Is that what you think of me? I believe in the Grail, not the Swastika!
Indiana Jones: [angrily] You stood up to be counted with the enemies of everything the Grail stands for! Who gives a *damn* what you believe?
Elsa: [pleadingly] You do!

Elsa: I believe in the Grail, not the Swastika.
Indiana Jones: You stood up to be counted with the enemies of everything the Grail stands for. Who gives a damn what you believe?
Elsa: You do.

Elsa: Don't look at me like that. We both wanted the Grail. I would have done anything to get it. You would have done the same.
Indiana Jones: I'm sorry you think so.

[Indy has untied a boat as a diversion for the Nazis]
Indiana Jones: Come on, Dad! Come on!
Professor Henry Jones: What about the boat? We're not going on the boat?

Butler: If you're a Scottish Lord, then I am Mickey Mouse.
Indiana Jones: How dare he.

Indiana Jones: Are you crazy? Don't go between them!
Elsa: Go between them! Are you crazy?

Indiana Jones: [grabbing Elsa by the throat] All I have to do is squeeze.
Elsa: All I have to do is scream.

Professor Henry Jones: Stop. You're going the wrong way. We need to get to Berlin.
Indiana Jones: Brody's this way.
Professor Henry Jones: My diary's in Berlin.
Indiana Jones: We don't need the diary, Dad. Marcus has the map.
Professor Henry Jones: There is more in the diary than just the map.

Professor Henry Jones: Well, he who finds the Grail must face the final challenge.
Indiana Jones: What final challenge?
Professor Henry Jones: Three devices of such lethal cunning.
Indiana Jones: Booby traps?
Professor Henry Jones: Oh yes. But I found the clues that will safely take us through, in the Chronicles of St. Anselm.
Indiana Jones: But what are they?
[pause]
Indiana Jones: Can't you remember?
Professor Henry Jones: I wrote them down in my Diary so that I wouldn't *have* to remember.

Indiana Jones: Half the German army's on our tail and you want me to go to Berlin? Into the lion's den?
Professor Henry Jones: Yes. The only thing that matters is the Grail.
Indiana Jones: What about Marcus?
Professor Henry Jones: Marcus would agree with me!

Indiana Jones: Jesus Christ...
Professor Henry Jones: [slaps him] That's for blasphemy.

Indiana Jones: Petroleum... I should stick a well down here and retire.

Walter Donovan: As you can now see, Dr. Jones, we are on the verge of completing a quest that began almost two thousand years ago. We're just one step away.
Indiana Jones: That's usually when the ground falls out from underneath your feet.

[Donovan wants Indy to get the Grail]
Walter Donovan: You could go down in history.
Indiana Jones: As what? A Nazi stooge like you?
Walter Donovan: The Nazis? Is that the limit of your vision? The Nazis want to write themselves into the Grail legend, take on the world. Well, they're welcome to it. But I want the Grail itself, the cup that gives everlasting life. Hitler can have the world, but he can't take it with him. I'm going to be drinking my own health after he's gone the way of the dodo.

Walter Donovan: [points a gun at Indy] The Grail is mine. And you're going to get it for me.
Indiana Jones: Shooting me won't get you anywhere.
Walter Donovan: You know something, Dr. Jones? You're absolutely right.
[He shoots Henry in the stomach]

Indiana Jones: Oh, rats!
[Indiana Jones finds a whole bunch of rats in his path]

Professor Henry Jones: [after hearing that Indy read the tablet] If only I could have been there with you.
Indiana Jones: There were rats, Dad.
Professor Henry Jones: [Startled] Rats?

Elsa: [meeting Indy and Marcus in Venice] The last time I saw your father we were in the library. He was very close to tracking down the Knight's tomb. I've never seen him so excited. He was as giddy as a schoolboy.
Indiana Jones: Who, Atilla The Professor? He was never giddy, even when he was a schoolboy.

Indiana Jones: [shouting, as the boat is being chopped up by a propeller] Why are you trying to kill us?
Kazim: Because you are looking for the Holy Grail!
Indiana Jones: My *father* was looking for the Holy Grail! Did you kill him too?
Kazim: No!
Indiana Jones: Where is he? Talk or you're dead! Dammit tell me! Tell me!
Kazim: If you don't let go Dr. Jones, we'll both die!
Indiana Jones: Then we'll die!
Kazim: My soul is prepared! How's yours?

Elsa: [to Indy after a kiss] How dare you kiss me!
[She kisses him]
Indiana Jones: [pulling away] Leave me alone, I don't like fast women.
Elsa: [biting his ear] And I hate arrogant men.

[Elsa has helped Vogal capture Indy and his father]
Indiana Jones: She ransacked her own room, and I fell for it!

[Indy and his father have boarded the airship]
Indiana Jones: Well, we made it!
Professor Henry Jones: [looking out from behind his newspaper] When we are airborne, with Germany behind us, *then* I will share that sentiment!

[Indy and his father have stolen a plane from the airship, and are now being chased by German fighters]
Indiana Jones: Dad, you're going to have to use the machine gun. Get it ready!
[Henry turns around and gets the gun ready]
Indiana Jones: [spotting an approaching fighter] 11 o'clock! Dad, 11 o'clock!
Professor Henry Jones: [looking at his watch] What happens at 11 o'clock?

Professor Henry Jones: I find, that if I just sit down to think...
[sits in chair, which tilts backward and opens up a hidden staircase]
Indiana Jones: [falling down hidden staircase] Daaaaad!
Professor Henry Jones: [resetting chair legs] The solution presents itself!

Indiana Jones: Look at this! I've gone and caught a sniffle!

Professor Henry Jones: [accidentally shoots their own plane with the machine gun]
Indiana Jones: Dad, are we hit?
Professor Henry Jones: More or less. Son, I'm sorry. They got us.

Indiana Jones: [as the room is burning] Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: What?
Indiana Jones: Dad!
Professor Henry Jones: What?
Indiana Jones: DAD!
Professor Henry Jones: WHAT?
Indiana Jones: Dad, head for the fireplace!

[Elsa picks up the Grail and attempts to leave the Temple with it]
Elsa: We have got it, come on!
Indiana Jones: Elsa. Elsa don't move.
Elsa: It's ours Indy, yours and mine.
Indiana Jones: Elsa don't cross the seal. The knight warned us not to take the grail from here!
[Elsa ignores Indiana and her bootheel steps across the Great Seal, triggering the temple's collapse]

[Elsa slips into a crevice and nearly falls, but Indiana grabs her leather gloved hands just in time. She slowly turns her head to see the grail resting below her]
Indiana Jones: Elsa...
[Elsa wrenches her left hand free to reach the grail]
Indiana Jones: Elsa. Don't Elsa. Elsa. Give me your other hand honey, I can't hold you!
Elsa: I can reach it... I can reach it...
[the glove on her hand starts slipping]
Indiana Jones: Elsa. Give me your hand, give me your other hand!
[Elsa cries out as she nearly touches the grail. The glove suddenly slips off her hand and she plunges into the abyss]
Indiana Jones: Elsa!

[Indiana slips and nearly falls into the abyss, but Henry grabs his hand]
Professor Henry Jones: Junior, give me your other hand! I can't hold on!
Indiana Jones: [reaching for the Grail] I can get it. I can almost reach it, Dad...
Professor Henry Jones: Indiana.
[surprised, Indy looks up at his father]
Professor Henry Jones: Indiana... let it go.

Sallah: Please, what does it always mean, this... this "Junior"?
Professor Henry Jones: That's his name.
[points to himself]
Professor Henry Jones: Henry Jones...
[points to Indy]
Professor Henry Jones: ...Junior.
Indiana Jones: I like "Indiana."
Professor Henry Jones: We named the *dog* Indiana.
Marcus Brody: May we go home now, please?
Sallah: The dog?
[starts laughing]
Sallah: You are named after the dog? HA HA HA...!
Indiana Jones: I've got a lot of fond memories of that dog.

Indiana Jones: Bingo!
Elsa: You don't disappoint, Dr. Jones. You're a great deal like your father.
Indiana Jones: Except he's lost and I'm not.

Indiana Jones: [steals a flower for Elsa] Fraulein, will you permit me?
Elsa: I usually don't.
Indiana Jones: I usually don't either.
Elsa: In that case I permit you.
Indiana Jones: It would make me very happy.
Elsa: But I am already sad, by tomorrow it will have faded.
Indiana Jones: Tomorrow I'll steal you another one.

Elsa: Dr. Jones?
Indiana Jones: Yes?
Elsa: I knew it was you, you have your father's eyes.
Indiana Jones: And my mother's ears but the rest belongs to you.
Elsa: It looks like the best parts have already been spoken for.

Elsa: [after finding that her room has been ransacked] My room.
Indiana Jones: Mine too.
Elsa: What were they looking for?
Indiana Jones: This.
Elsa: The Grail Diary?
Indiana Jones: Uh huh.
Elsa: You had it? You didn't trust me?
Indiana Jones: I didn't know you. At least I let you tag along.
Elsa: Oh yes, Give them a flower and they'll follow you anywhere.
Indiana Jones: Knock it off, you're not mad.
Elsa: No?
Indiana Jones: No, you like the way I do things.
Elsa: You're lucky I don't do things the same way. You'd still be standing at the Venice Pier.
Indiana Jones: What do you think is going on here? Since I've met you I've nearly been incinerated, drowned, shot at and chopped into fish bait. We're caught in the middle of something sinister here. My guess is dad found out more than he was looking for and until I am sure I am going to continue to do things the way I think they should be done.
[Indiana Kisses Elsa]
Elsa: How dare you kiss me.
[Elsa Kisses Indiana]
Indiana Jones: Leave me alone, I don't like fast women.
Elsa: [while nibbling on Indiana's ear] And I hate arrogant men.
Indiana Jones: [after they both fall into bed, kissing] Ahh, Venice.

Indiana Jones: [gesturing to a window where he just threw out a Nazi Officer] No ticket.

Indiana Jones: Oh, Jesus Christ!
[Professor Jones Senior slaps him]

Fedora: You've got heart, kid.
[regarding the cross]
Fedora: But that belongs to me.
Young Indy: It belongs to Coronado.
Fedora: Coronado is dead. And so are all his grandchildren.
Young Indy: This should be in a museum!

Young Henry: What are you gonna do?
Young Indy: I dont know, but i'll think of something!

---

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)

Mutt Williams: You know, for an old man you ain't bad in a fight. What are you, like 80?
Indiana Jones: Thanks a lot.
Mutt Williams: What are you, like, 80?

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Belief, Dr. Jones, is a gift you have yet to receive. My sympathies.
Indiana Jones: Oh, I believe, sister. That's why I'm down here.

Mutt Williams: I don't understand. Why the legend about the city of gold?
Indiana Jones: The Ugha word for gold translates as "treasure." But their treasure wasn't gold. It was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure.

Mac: You broke my nose!
Indiana Jones: I told you.
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Enough! You will speak to Oxley and lead us to Akator, yes?
Indiana Jones: Nyet.
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Take him outside.

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: This warehouse is where you and your government have hidden all of your secrets, yes?
Indiana Jones: This is a military warehouse. I've never been here before in my life.

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Don't toy with me, Dr. Jones. What is the point of all this?
Indiana Jones: If it's still magnetic, the metal in this gun powder should point the way.

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: [Irina has Marion and Indiana hostage] So, Dr. Jones, you will help us?
[a soldier cocks a pistol and points it at Marion's back]
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: A simple "yes" will do.
Indiana Jones: Oh, Marion, you had to go and get yourself kidnapped.
Marion Ravenwood: Not like you did any better.
Indiana Jones: Same old, same old.

Indiana Jones: Marion, take the wheel.
Mutt Williams: That's not fair. She drove the truck.
Indiana Jones: Don't be a child. Find something to fight with.

Indiana Jones: [on seeing the Crystal Skull] Unbelievable.

Indiana Jones: So what are you, a triple agent?
Mac: Nah, I just lied about being a double.

Indiana Jones: You want to be a good archaeologist...
[Mutt drives them out of the building on his motorcycle]
Indiana Jones: ...you've got to get out of the library!

Indiana Jones: [stuck in quicksand] Oxley, don't just sit there. For God's sake, man. Go get help!
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Help?
Indiana Jones: Help!
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Help?
[runs into the trees searching for help]
Indiana Jones: [later on, they're surrounded by Russian soldiers after getting pulled out of the quicksand by Mutt] Good work, Ox. Thanks.
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: [points at the Russians] Help.

Indiana Jones: Be careful, you may get exactly what you wish for.
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: I usually do.

Marion Ravenwood: Mutt can be a little impetuous.
Indiana Jones: Well, it's not the worse quality in the world.
[Indy and Marion sink further into the ground]
Indiana Jones: Keep your arms above the surface. When the kid comes back, grab on.
Marion Ravenwood: Indy, he...
Indiana Jones: He's a good kid, Marion. You should get off his back about school.
Marion Ravenwood: Mutt, I mean...
Indiana Jones: Not everybody is cut out for it.
Marion Ravenwood: His name is Henry!
Indiana Jones: Henry. Good name.
Marion Ravenwood: He's your son.
Indiana Jones: My son?
Marion Ravenwood: Henry Jones the III.
Indiana Jones: [beat] Why the hell didn't you make him finish school?

Indiana Jones: Leave it to Ox to write a riddle in a dead language.

Indiana Jones: [crashes into a truck windshield after a failed swing from his whip] Damn, I thought that was closer...

Mutt Williams: Name's Mutt, Mutt Williams.
Indiana Jones: Mutt?
Mutt Williams: Yeah.
Indiana Jones: What kind of name is that?
Mutt Williams: It's the one I picked. You got a problem with it?
Indiana Jones: Take it easy.

Mutt Williams: One of the scorpions just stung me! Am I gonna die?
Indiana Jones: How big?
Mutt Williams: Huge!
Indiana Jones: Good.
Mutt Williams: Good?
Indiana Jones: When it comes to scorpions, the bigger the better. Small one bites you, don't keep it to yourself.

[Mutt pops open his switchblade, ready to fight two KGB agents]
Indiana Jones: Nice try kid, but it looks like you brought a knife...
[both agents pull out guns]
Indiana Jones: ...to a gun fight.

Indiana Jones: Nazca Indians used to bind their infants' head with rope to elongate the skull like that.
Mutt Williams: Why?
Indiana Jones: Honor the gods.
Mutt Williams: No, no. God's head is not like that, man.
Indiana Jones: Depends on who your god is.

Indiana Jones: We were younger.
Mac: I still am young!
Indiana Jones: We had guns. Put your hands down, will you? You're embarrassing us.
Mac: Bet you 500 bucks we get out of this.
[Dovchenko arrives and faces Indy]
Mac: Let's call it 100.

Indiana Jones: How did Deidra take the news?
Dean Charles Stanforth: How does any wife take such things? The look on her face is a combination of pride and panic.

Indiana Jones: Brutal couple of years, huh, Charlie? First Dad, then Marcus.
Dean Charles Stanforth: We seem to have reached the age where life stops giving us things and starts taking them away.

Indiana Jones: What's your mom's name again?
Mutt Williams: Mary. Mary Williams. You remember her?
Indiana Jones: There've been a lot of Marys, kid.
Mutt Williams: [jolts up from chair] Shut up! That's my mother you're talking about! All right? That's my mother.
Indiana Jones: You don't have to get sore all the time just to prove how tough you are.

Mutt Williams: What's he gonna do now?
Marion Ravenwood: I don't think he plans that far ahead.
Mutt Williams: Yeah.
Indiana Jones: [pops out from the inside of the truck with a bazooka] Scooch over, will you, Son?
Mutt Williams: Don't call me "son." Don't.
Indiana Jones: [ignoring Mutt's complaint] I think I'd cover my ears if I were you.
[Indy fires a rocket at a giant tree cutter, but it sends the large circular blade bouncing straight for them, cutting through other trucks as it goes]
Indiana Jones: Duck! Duck!

Indiana Jones: Why don't you stick around, Junior?
Mutt Williams: [chuckles] I don't know. Why didn't you, Dad?
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Dad!
[gives Indy a questioning look]
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Dad?
Indiana Jones: Somewhere your grandpa is laughing.

Indiana Jones: Where'd they go? Space?
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Not into space. Into the space between spaces.

Mutt Williams: You're a teacher?
Indiana Jones: Part-time.

Indiana Jones: [watching Mutt jump around, trying to get scorpions off of himself] Dance on your own time, will you?

Mutt Williams: Professor, this really is a dead end. Look.
Indiana Jones: [after climbing on the rock and noticing that it shifts with force, tilting it first away, and then back to Mutt, with a grin] Come on, genius.

Indiana Jones: I think I understand, Ox. Someone came?

Marion Ravenwood: What the hell is that?
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: A portal! A pathway to another dimension!
Indiana Jones: I don't think we want to go that way.

[last lines]
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Well done, Henry!
Indiana Jones, Mutt Williams: Thanks, Ox.

Mutt Williams: [as Indy sinks in a quicksand-esque substance, he is passed a long snake] Grab on. It's a rat snake!
Indiana Jones: Rat snakes aren't that big.
Mutt Williams: Well, this one is, all right? It's not even poisonous. Now grab on!
Indiana Jones: Go get something else.
Mutt Williams: Like what?
Indiana Jones: Like a rope or something.
Mutt Williams: There's no Sears and Roebuck here! Grab the snake!
Indiana Jones: Maybe I can touch the bottom.
Marion Ravenwood: There's no bottom. Now grab it.
Indiana Jones: I think I can feel it with my feet
Mutt Williams: Grab the snake!
Indiana Jones: Stop calling it that!
Mutt Williams: It's a snake! What do you want me to call it?
Indiana Jones: Say "rope."
Mutt Williams: What?
Indiana Jones: Say "Grab the rope"!
Mutt Williams, Marion Ravenwood: Grab the rope!

Indiana Jones: You're not from around here, are you?
Agent Irina Spalko: [taking off her glasses] Where is it you would imagine I am from, Dr. Jones?
Indiana Jones: Well, the way you're sinking your teeth into those wubble-u's, I should think maybe Eastern Ukraine.

Indiana Jones: [jumping out of the car] Big damn ants! Go!

Indiana Jones: Oh, that can't be good.
Speaker Voice: All personnel, it is now one minute to zero time. Put on goggles or turn away. Do not remove goggles or face burst until ten seconds after first light.
Indiana Jones: That can't be good at all.

[Mutt's knife and some gold coins adhere to the Skull]
Indiana Jones: Crystal's not magnetic.
Mutt Williams: Neither is gold.

Mutt Williams: What are they? Spacemen?
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: [completely sanely] Interdimensional beings, in point of fact.
Indiana Jones: [dryly] Welcome back, Ox.

Indiana Jones: I've got a bad feeling about this.

Marion Ravenwood: You still living a trail of human wreckage, or have you retired?
Indiana Jones: Why? You looking for a date?
Marion Ravenwood: With anyone but you.

General Ross: Indy, thank God. Don't you know it's dangerous to climb into a refrigerator? Those things can be deathtraps!
Indiana Jones: [shakes General Ross' hand] Good to see you too, Bob.

Mutt Williams: [Landing in duck boat after retrieving skull from Irina, looks at Indy] Whoa.
Indiana Jones: [Smiles back at mutt] Whoa.
[Looks ahead]
Indiana Jones: WHOA!

Dovchenko: You can get us into that building, yes?
Indiana Jones: Drop dead.
[Dovchenko slaps Indy across his face]
Indiana Jones: I'm sorry. I meant drop dead, comrade.

Indiana Jones: Compass! I need a compass! You know, north, south, east...
Mac: West.
Indiana Jones: No compass?
Indiana Jones: [to Dovchenko] I need your bullets!
Dovchenko: [to Russians] HaHa! On zhelayet moih patrone!
[Russian laugh]
Indiana Jones: [to Spalko] The contents of that box are highly magnitized. I need gun powder. You want my help or not?

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Clearly I have chosen the wrong pressure point. Perhaps I can find a more sensitive one.
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: [to Russian soldiers] Prinesite yom!
Marion Ravenwood: [Struggling] Get your hands off me, you rotten Russki son of a bitch!
Marion Ravenwood: Indiana Jones.
Marion Ravenwood: [Indy shrugs and laughs] About time you showed up.
Mutt Williams: Mom!
Marion Ravenwood: Sweetheart.
[Runs over to Mutt and hug him]
Indiana Jones: "Mom"?

Indiana Jones: [Studying Oxley's drawings] "The water sleeps until the great snake." These aren't just drawings, they're directions. Get me a map!
Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: Karta!

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: No defiant last words, Dr. Jones?
Indiana Jones: I like Ike.
Dovchenko: Put down gun.
Indiana Jones: You got it, pal.
[Drops gun, and gun fires off]

Mutt Williams: [Looking at Indy and Marion] No! No, he was Britsh! My dad was an RAF Pilot; he was a war hero; not some school teacher!
Marion Ravenwood: No, sweetheart! Collin was your step father. We started dating 3 months after you were born! He was a good man!
Indiana Jones: Wait... wait... wait a minute! Collin? As in Collin Williams? Ha! You, you married him? I introduced you!
Marion Ravenwood: I think you gave up your vote on who I married, when you decided to break it off a week before the wedding!
Indiana Jones: You and I both knew Marion, that it wasn't gonna work out!
Marion Ravenwood: Then why didn't you ever talk to me about it?
Indiana Jones: Because, we never had an argument I won!
Dovchenko: Oh, for the love of God! Shut the hell up!
Marion Ravenwood: Didn't you ever wonder why Ox stopped writing, he hated that you walked out on me!
Mutt Williams: Would you two just stop!
Indiana Jones: Yeah, Marion! Let's not let the kid see mom and dad fight!
Mutt Williams: You're not my dad, alright!
Indiana Jones: You bet I am; and I've got news for you; you're gonna go back and finish school!
Mutt Williams: Oh really! What happend to there's not a damn thing wrong, with you kid, don't let anybody ealse tell you any different! You don't remember saying that!
Indiana Jones: That was before I was your father!
Mutt Williams: You're not my father!
Marion Ravenwood: [Dovchenko gets up] Oh yes, he is your father!
Indiana Jones: You should've told me about the kid, Marion; I had a right to know!
Marion Ravenwood: [Dovchenko gags Marions mouth] You vanished, after that!
Indiana Jones: I wrote!
Marion Ravenwood: A year later! By then, Mutt was born, and I was married!
Indiana Jones: Why in the bother did you tell me now?
Marion Ravenwood: Because I thought we were gonna die!
Indiana Jones: Not yet!
[Indy and Mutt start kicking Dovchenko until he falls over]
Mutt Williams: [Mutt empties knife out of shoe, and throws it to Indy, and it lands on Indy's shoulder, and drops to Indy's hand] Got it?
[Mutt hears rip]
Mutt Williams: Oh shit!
[Indy cuts himself loose, then Mutt]

Mutt Williams: Mom!
Indiana Jones: Honey!
Mac: Slow down!
Indiana Jones: Honey! Stop, we're gonna go the cliff!
Marion Ravenwood: That's the idea!
Indiana Jones: Bad idea; give me the wheel!
Marion Ravenwood: Trust me!
[Steps on gas]
Marion Ravenwood: [Mutt screems]
[Car lands in tree, and Marion smiles and steps on gas, drives down into the river, and tree flys up and hits Russian soldiers, and some of them fall]
Indiana Jones: Don't ever do that again!
Marion Ravenwood: Yes, dear!
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Three times it drops! The way down...
Indiana Jones: Reverse! Put it in reverse! Reverse! Reverse!
[Go off water]
Indiana Jones: [Everyone screems]
Indiana Jones: [Coughing] Three times it drops?
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Three times it drops!
Mutt Williams: He means by land?
Marion Ravenwood: Oh, what does he mean?
Indiana Jones: He means one... two...
[Go off another waterfall]
Indiana Jones: [Coughing] ... Three!
[Takes off hat]
Indiana Jones: [Go off biggest waterfall]
[Screeming]
Indiana Jones: [Marion still holding wheel with no truck!] Marion! Marion!
[Pulls wheel out of her hands]
Professor 'Ox' Oxley: Through eyes at last I saw in tears...
Mutt Williams: ...the golden vision reapears! Through eyes... through eyes in tears! We gotta go through that waterfall!
Indiana Jones: The skull has to be returned! I'll do it! No one else has to come!
Mutt Williams: Who cares! It's brought us nothing but trouble!
[Pointing at Ox]
Mutt Williams: Look what it did to him!
Indiana Jones: I have to return it!
Marion Ravenwood: Why you?
Indiana Jones: Because it told me to!

Indiana Jones: What exactly am I being accused of other than surviving a nuclear explosion?

Mutt Williams: [in a graveyard]
[reading a sign]
Mutt Williams: "Grave robbers will be shot."
Indiana Jones: Good thing we're not grave robbers.

Mutt Williams: I took Spanish. I didn't understand a word of that. What was it?
Indiana Jones: Quechua, local Incan dialect.
Mutt Williams: Where'd you learn that one?
Indiana Jones: Long story.
Mutt Williams: I got time.
Indiana Jones: I rode with Pancho Villa. A couple of his guys spoke it.
Mutt Williams: Bullshit!
Indiana Jones: You asked?

Mac: You're lucky I turned up, Jonesey. Dovchenko there wanted to blow your brains out. That's the third time I saved your life.
Indiana Jones: Unshackle me. I'll give you a big hug.

Col. Dr. Irina Spalko: How fortunate our failure to kill you, Dr. Jones. You survive to be of service to us once again.
Indiana Jones: Well, you know me, always glad to help.

Marion Ravenwood: [Indy cuts Marion loose, and removes gag] I'm sure I wasn't the only person to go on with my life. There must have been plenty of women for you over the years.
Indiana Jones: Yeah. There were a few, but they all had the same problem.
Marion Ravenwood: Yeah? What's that?
Indiana Jones: [Indy cuts through roof] They weren't you, honey.
[Throws Mutt knife, and climbs out of truck]
Indiana Jones: [Mutt smiles and laughs]
[Mutt and Marion get thrown around truck!]
Indiana Jones: [Indy throws Russian out of truck, and big action scene starts]

Indiana Jones: This is incredible.
Mutt Williams: Unreal.

---

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)

Indiana Jones: Are you trying to develop a sense of humor or am I going deaf?

Indiana Jones: Willie, Willie, Willie. What kind of a name is that? Is it short for something?
Willie: Willie is my professional name, Indiana.
Short Round: Hey, lady! You call him Dr. Jones!
Indiana Jones: *My* professional name.

Indiana Jones: [trapped on a rope bridge] Shorty!
[Indy shouts to Shorty in Chinese. Short Round, wide-eyed, nods and wraps a rope around his arm]
Short Round: Hang on lady, we going for a ride!
[Indy raises his sword, and Willie realizes]
Willie: Oh... my... God! Oh my God... Oh my God...
[wraps a rope around her arm]
Willie: Is he nuts?
Short Round: He no nuts, he's crazy!

Short Round: What is Sankara?
Indiana Jones: Fortune and glory, kid. Fortune and glory.

Indiana Jones: Wear your jewels to bed Princess?
Willie: Yeah... and nothing else. Shock you?
Indiana Jones: Nothing shocks me. I'm a scientist.

Willie: You're gonna get killed chasing after your damn fortune and glory!
Indiana Jones: Maybe. But not today.

[Indy threatens to drop the Sankara stones into the gorge]
Indiana Jones: You want the stones, let 'em go!
[the Thuggees stop, uncertain. Willie smirks at Mola Ram]
Indiana Jones: Let 'em go!
Mola Ram: [laughs] Drop them, Dr. Jones! They will be found! You won't!

Indiana Jones: [groping desperately down Willie's dress] Where's the antidote?
Willie: Oh, listen, I just met you! Oh, I'm not that kind of girl...
Short Round: Hey, Dr. Jones, no time for love. We've got company.

Indiana Jones: [meeting on the floor] The antidote!
Willie: Where's the diamond?

Indiana Jones: Mola Ram! Prepare to meet Kali... in Hell!

Willie: Aren't you gonna introduce us?
Lao Che: This is Willie Scott; this is Indiana Jones, a famous archaeologist.
Willie: Well I always thought that archaeologists were always funny looking men going around looking for their mommies.
Indiana Jones: Mummies.

Willie: So what are you supposed to be, a lion tamer?
Indiana Jones: I'm allowing you to tag along. So why don't you give your mouth a rest. Okay doll?
Willie: What do you mean "tag along"? Ever since you got into my club, you haven't been able to take your eyes off of me.
Indiana Jones: Oh, yeah?
[tugs his hat down over his eyes, and falls asleep]

Willie: You know how to fly, don't you?
Indiana Jones: Um, no. Do you?

Chattar Lal: Dr Jones, wasn't it the Sultan of Madagascar who threatened to cut off your head if you ever returned to his country?
Indiana Jones: No, it wasn't my head.
Chattar Lal: Then your hands, perhaps?
Indiana Jones: No, it wasn't my hands. It was my... .
[looks down at his groin]
Indiana Jones: My misunderstanding.

Willie: Ooh, what big birds!
Indiana Jones: Those aren't big birds, sweetheart! They're giant vampire bats!

Lao Che: So it's true? You've found Nurhachi?
Indiana Jones: You know I did. Last night one of your boys tried to get Nurhachi without paying for him.
[Kao Kan holds his bandaged hand]
Lao Che: You have insulted my son.
Indiana Jones: No, you have insulted me. I spared his life.

[Indy and Short Round are exploring a cavern]
Short Round: Feels like I step on fortune cookie!
Indiana Jones: It's not fortune cookies. Let me take a look.
[Indy lights a lighter to find bugs crawling all over the place]
Short Round: That no cookie!

Shaman of Maypore: Now you see the power of the rock you bring back.
Indiana Jones: Yes. I understand its power now.

[Indy and Short Round are trapped in a room]
Indiana Jones: Stop! Look, just - stand against the wall, will ya?
[Short Round stands against the wall, springing a trap]
Short Round: You say to stand against the wall! I listen to what you say! Not my fault! Not my fault!

Indiana Jones: Shorty, where's my razor?

Short Round: Wow! Holy Smoke! Crash landing!
Indiana Jones: Short Round, step on it.
Short Round: Okey dokey, Dr. Jones.
[turns his cap around]
Short Round: Hold on to your potatoes!
Willie: For crying out loud, there's a *kid* driving the car!

Indiana Jones: [on Willie's incessant screaming] The biggest trouble with her is the noise.

Indiana Jones: You know what your problem is, Princess? You're too used to getting your own way.
Willie: And you're too proud to admit that you're crazy about me, Dr. Jones!
Indiana Jones: If you want me Willie, you know where to find me.
Willie: Five minutes. You'll be back over here in five minutes.
Indiana Jones: I'll be asleep in five minutes.
Willie: Five. You know it, and I know it.

[one of Mola Ram's guards is about to kill Short Round]
Indiana Jones: Wait! WAIT! He's mine!
[Indy grabs Shorty and holds him over the pit]
Indiana Jones: I'm all right kid.
[Indy winks at him]

Willie: There are two dead people in here!
Indiana Jones: There's gonna be two dead people in here! Hurry!

Indiana Jones: Willie, we-are-going-to-DIE!

Indiana Jones: We're in trouble!
Willie: Trouble? What kind of trouble?
Indiana Jones: It's a long story. Better hurry up or you won't get to hear it.

Indiana Jones: Stay behind me, Short Round. Step where I step, and don't touch anything.
[curious, Short Round touches a lamp. A door falls open, with two dessicated mummies falling out. Short Round yells and backpedals]
Short Round: I step where you step! I touch nothing!

[last lines]
Indiana Jones: Anything can happen. It's a long way to Delhi.
Willie: No, thanks. No more adventures with you, Dr. Jones.
Indiana Jones: Sweetheart, after all the fun we've had together?
Willie: If you think I'm going to Delhi with you, or anyplace else after all the trouble you've gotten me into, think again, buster! I'm going home to Missouri where they never feed you snakes before ripping your heart out and lowering you into hot pits! This is NOT my idea of a swell time!
[to native]
Willie: Excuse me, sir. I need a guide to Delhi. If you could...
[Indy snaps his whip around Willie's waist and pulls her back]
Willie: Oh...
Short Round: Very funny. Very funny.
[Indy and Willie start to kiss]
Short Round: Uh-oh!

Indiana Jones: [after listening to Mola Ram's plans] What a vivid imagination.

Indiana Jones: [trapped in the middle of the rope bridge] Oh, shit.

Indiana Jones: Kali Ma protects us! We are her children! We pledge our devotion to her with an offering of flesh... and blood!

Indiana Jones: We weren't brought here. Our plane crashed.
Willie: [nodding and smiling] It crashed.
Shaman of Maypore: [laughing] No, no, no. We prayed to Shiva to help us find the stone. It was Shiva who made you fall from sky. So you will go to Pankot Palace... and find Shivalinga... and bring back to us. Bring back to us. Bring back to us.

Willie: [about the Sankara Stone] You could have kept it.
Indiana Jones: Nah, it would of just been another rock collecting dust.
Willie: Yeah, but it would have given you your fortune and glory.

Lao Che: You never told me you spoke my language, Doctor Jones.
Indiana Jones: Only on special occasions.

Indiana Jones: It's okay, kid. It's me.

[cutting between Indiana and Willie's rooms]
Willie: [looks at her clock] Five minutes...
Indiana Jones: [looks at his] Four and a half...

[cutting between Indiana and Willie's rooms]
Indiana Jones: "Palace slave"...
Willie: "Nocturnal activities"...
Indiana Jones: *I'm* a conceited ape?
Willie: "I'll tell you in the morning"...
Indiana Jones: I can't believe this.
Willie: He's not coming.
Indiana Jones: She's not coming.
[pause]
Indiana Jones: I can't believe I'm not going.

[after getting dumped into a pond]
Willie: [crying] I was happy in Shanghai! I had a little house, and a garden! My friends were rich, we went to parties all the time in limousines! I *hate* being outside!
[Willie angrily splashes the water]
Willie: [gasps] I'm a singer! I could lose my voice!
Indiana Jones: I think we'll camp here tonight.

Indiana Jones: [after the palace dinner] I've got something for you.
Willie: There's nothing you have that I could possibly want.
Indiana Jones: Right.
[turns and uncovers a plate of fruit, Indy takes a bite from an apple. Willie runs over and begins to devour the fruit]
Willie: You're a very nice man.

Indiana Jones: [to Lao Che] I suggest you give me what you owe me... or 'Anything Goes!'

[repeatedly, as Mola Ram is trying to get the stones in Indiana's bag]
Indiana Jones: You betrayed Shiva!

[as Indiana Jones drinks his martini, Kao Kan's henchmen laugh as he holds up a vial]
Indiana Jones: What is that?
Kao Kan: Antidote.
Indiana Jones: Antidote to what?
Kao Kan: [matter-of-factly] To the poison you just drank.
[laughs aloud]

---

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Belloq: How odd that it should end this way for us after so many stimulating encounters. I almost regret it. Where shall I find a new adversary so close to my own level?
Indiana: Try the local sewer.

Brody: However, an Egyptian pharaoh...
Indiana: Shishak.
Brody: ...yes, invaded the city of Jerusalem round about 980 B.C., and he may have take the Ark back to the city of Tanis and hidden it in a secret chamber called The Well of Souls.
Major Eaton: [skeptically] Secret chamber?
Brody: However, about a year after the pharaoh had returned to Egypt, the city of Tanis was consumed by the desert in a sand storm which lasted a whole year. Wiped clean by the wrath of God.
Major Eaton: [turns slowly toward Col. Musgrove] Uh... huh.
Colonel Musgrove: Obviously, we've come to the right men. Now you seem to know, uh, all about this Tanis, then.
Indiana: No, no, not really. Ravenwood is the real expert. Abner did the first serious work on Tanis. Collected some of its relics. It was his obsession, really. But he never found the city.
Major Eaton: Frankly, we're somewhat suspicious of Mr. Ravenwood, an American being mentioned so prominently in a secret Nazi cable.
Brody: Oh, rubbish. Ravenwood's no Nazi.
Colonel Musgrove: Well, what do the Nazis want him for then?
Indiana: Well, obviously, the Nazis are looking for the headpiece to Staff of Ra and they think Abner's got it.
Major Eaton: What exactly is a headpiece to the Staff of Ra?
Indiana: Well, the staff is just a stick. I don't know, about this big. Nobody really knows for sure how high. And it's...
[turns blackboard to blank side]
Indiana: it's, uh... it's capped with an elaborate headpiece in the shape of the sun with a crystal in the center. And what you did was, you take the staff to a special room in Tanis, a map room with a miniature of the city all laid out on the floor. And if you put the staff in a certain place at a certain time of day, the sun shone through here and made beam that came down on the floor here... and gave you the exact location of the Well of the Souls.
Colonel Musgrove: Where the Ark of the Covenant was kept, right?.
Indiana: That's exactly what the Nazis are looking for.
Major Eaton: Now what does this Ark look like?
Indiana: Uh... there's a picture of it right here.
[opens a book on the table]
Indiana: That's it.
[they all look at an illustration of the Hebrews devastating their enemy with the Ark]
Major Eaton: Good God!
Brody: Yes, that's just what the Hebrews thought.
Colonel Musgrove: [pointing to a beam of light] Uh, now what's that supposed to be coming out of there?
Indiana: Lightning. Fire. Power of God or something.
Major Eaton: I'm beginning to understand Hitler's interest in this.
Brody: Oh, yes. The Bible speaks of the Ark leveling mountains and laying waste to entire regions. An army which carries the Ark before it... is invincible.

Indiana: Here, take this,
[hands Marion a torch]
Indiana: Wave it at anything that slithers.
Marion: The whole place is slitherin'!

Major Eaton: Doctor Jones, we've heard a lot about you.
Indiana: Have you.
Major Eaton: Professor of Archeology. Expert on the occult and how does one say it? Obtainer of rare antiquities.
Indiana: That's one way of saying it. Why don't you sit down you'll be more comfortable.
Colonel Musgrove: Yes, you're a man of many talents.
Major Eaton: Now, you studied under Professor Ravenwood at the University of Chicago.
Indiana: Yes, I did.
Major Eaton: You have no idea of his present whereabouts?
Indiana: Only rumors really. Somewhere in Asia, I think. I haven't really spoken to him in 10 years. We were friends once but we had a bit of a falling out, I'm afraid.
Colonel Musgrove: Now, Doctor Jones, you must understand that this is all completely confidential.
Indiana: I understand.
Colonel Musgrove: Yesterday afternoon our European section intercepted a German communique that was sent from Cairo to Berlin.
Major Eaton: You see for the last two years the Nazis have had teams of archeologists running around the world looking for all sorts of religious artifacts. Hitler's gone nuts on the subject. He's crazy. He's obsessed with the occult. And right now, apparently, there is some kind of German archeological dig going on in the desert outside Cairo.
Colonel Musgrove: Now we have some information here but we can't make anything out of it and maybe you can. "Tannis development proceeding. Acquire headpeace, Staff of Ra, Abner Ravenwood, US."
Indiana: The Nazis have discovered Tannis!
Major Eaton: Now just what does that mean to you? Tannis.
Indiana: Tannis is one of the possible resting places of the Lost Ark.
Colonel Musgrove: The Lost Ark?
Indiana: Yeah, the Ark of the Covenant. The chest the Hebrews used to carry the 10 Commandments around in.
Major Eaton: Alright, now, what do you mean the 10 Commandments, you talking about THE 10 Commandments?
Indiana: Yes, the actual 10 Commandments the original stone tablets that Moses came down out of Mount Horeb and smashed if you believe in that sort of thing. Didn't you guys ever go to Sunday School? Look, the Hebrews took the broken pieces and put them into the Ark. When they settled in Cainan they put the Ark in a place called The Temple of Solomon where it stayed for many years. 'Till all of the sudden, whoosh, it was gone.
Major Eaton: Where?
Indiana: Nobody knows where or when.

[Indiana needs his bullwhip to swing across a chasm]
Indiana: Give me the whip.
Satipo: Throw me the idol. No time to argue. Throw me idol, I'll throw you the whip.
Indiana: [throws the idol] Give me the whip.
Satipo: Adiós, señor.

Brody: Marion's the least of your worries right now, believe me, Indy.
Indiana: What do you mean?
Brody: Well, I mean that for nearly three thousand years man has been searching for the lost ark. It's not something to be taken lightly. No one knows its secrets. It's like nothing you've ever gone after before.
Indiana: [laughing] Oh, Marcus. What are you trying to do, scare me? You sound like my mother. We've known each other for a long time. I don't believe in magic, a lot of superstitious hocus pocus. I'm going after a find of incredible historical significance, you're talking about the boogie man. Besides, you know what a cautious fellow I am.
[throws his gun into his suitcase]

Satipo: Let us hurry. There is nothing to fear here.
Indiana: That's what scares me.

Indiana: There's a big snake in the plane, Jock.
Jock: Oh, that's just my pet snake Reggie.
Indiana: I hate snakes, Jock. I hate 'em.
Jock: C'mon, show a little backbone, will ya?

Marion: Well, Jones, at least you haven't forgotten how to show a lady a good time.
Indiana: Boy, you're something.
Marion: Yeah? I'll tell you what. Until I get back my five thousand dollars, you're gonna get more than you bargained for. I'm your goddamn partner.

Marion: You're not the man I knew ten years ago.
Indiana: It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage.

Sallah: Indy, there is something that troubles me.
Indiana: What is it?
Sallah: The Ark. If it is there, at Tanis, then it is something that man was not meant to disturb. Death has always surrounded it. It is not of this earth.

Dietrich: Dr. Jones, surely you don't think you can escape from this island?
Indiana: That depends on how reasonable we're all willing to be. All I want is the girl.
Dietrich: And if we refuse?
Indiana: Then your Füher has no prize.

Indiana: You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do.

Belloq: You and I are very much alike. Archeology is our religion, yet we have both fallen from the pure faith. Our methods have not differed as much as you pretend. I am but a shadowy reflection of you. It would take only a nudge to make you like me. To push you out of the light.
Indiana: Now you're getting nasty.

[Upon opening the Well of the Souls and peering down into it]
Sallah: Indy, why does the floor move?
Indiana: Give me your torch.
[Sallah does, and Indy drops it in]
Indiana: Snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes?
Sallah: Asps. Very dangerous. You go first.

Indiana: This site also demonstrates one of the great dangers of archeology, not to life and limb, although that does sometimes take place, I'm talking about folklore.

Sallah: Indy, you have no time. If you still want the ark, it is being loaded onto a truck for Cairo.
Indiana: Truck? What truck?

Indiana: Meet me at Omar's. Be ready for me. I'm going after that truck.
Sallah: How?
Indiana: I don't know, I'm making this up as I go.

Belloq: What a fitting end to your life's pursuits. You're about to become a permanent addition to this archaeological find. Who knows? In a thousand years, even you may be worth something.
Indiana: Ha ha ha ha.
[under his breath]
Indiana: Son of a bitch.

Indiana: I can only say I'm sorry so many times.
Marion: Well, say it again anyway.
Indiana: Sorry.

Indiana: Hello, Marion.
Marion: Indiana Jones. I always knew some day you'd come walking back through my door. I never doubted that. Something made it inevitable. So, what are you doing here in Nepal?
Indiana: I need one of the pieces your father collected.
[Marion surprises him with a right cross to the jaw]
Marion: I've learned to hate you in the last ten years.
Indiana: I never meant to hurt you.
Marion: I was a child. I was in love. It was wrong and you knew it.
Indiana: You knew what you were doing.
Marion: Now I do. This is my place. Get out.

[Indy meets Belloq in a crowded bar]
Indiana: Belloq.
Belloq: Good afternoon, Doctor Jones.
Indiana: I oughta kill you right now.
Belloq: Not a very private place for a murder.

Indiana: I'm gonna blow up the Ark, Rene.
Belloq: Your persistence surprises even me. You're going to give mercenaries a bad name.

Indiana: The Ark of the Covenant, the chest that the Hebrews used to carry around the Ten Commandments.
Major Eaton: What, you mean THE Ten Commandments?
Indiana: Yes, the actual Ten Commandments, the original stone tablets that Moses brought down from Mt. Horeb and smashed, if you believe in that sort of thing...
[the officers stare at him blankly]
Indiana: Didn't any of you guys ever go to Sunday school?

[looking at an old picture of the Ark]
Colonel Musgrove: Now, what's that supposed to be coming out of there?
Indiana: Lightning. Fire. The power of God or something.
Major Eaton: I'm beginning to understand Hitler's interest in this.

[talking about Marion's late father]
Marion: He said you were a bum.
Indiana: Aw, he's being generous.
Marion: The most gifted bum he ever trained. You know, he loved you like a son. Took a hell of a lot for you to alienate him.
Indiana: Not much, just you.

[Discussing the fate of the Ark]
Maj. Eaton: We have top men working on it now.
Indiana: Who?
Maj. Eaton: Top... men.

Indiana: Take this...
[hands torch to Marion]
Indiana: Wave it at anything that slithers.

[the old man reveals writing on the back of the medallion, which states that part of the staff must be removed]
Indiana: Balloq's medallion only had writing on one side? You sure about that?
Sallah: Positive!
Indiana: Balloq's staff is too long.
Indiana, Sallah: They're digging in the wrong place!

[last lines]
Marion: Hey, what happened? You don't look very happy.
Indiana: Fools. Bureaucratic fools.
Marion: What'd they say?
Indiana: They don't know what they've got there.
Marion: Well, I know what I've got here. Come on. I'll buy you a drink. You know, a drink?

Marion: [as she sees Indy's whip and thinks it to be a snake in the Well of Souls, thus putting a torch to it] Indy!
Indiana: Ahh! Jes-us!

Indiana: [Indy's first lines] This is it... This is where Forrestall cashed in.
Satipo: A friend of yours?
Indiana: A competitor... he was good. He was very good.

[Marion removes heavy robe to reveal sexy satin negligèe]
Indiana: Where'd you get that?
Marion: From him.
Indiana: Who him?
Marion: Katanga. I got a feeling I'm not the first woman to travel with these pirates.

Omar: This were the old way, this says "six Kadan height - "
Indiana: About seventy-two inches.
Omar: Wait!
[turns medallion over]
Omar: "And take back one Kadan, to honor the Hebrew God whose ark this is."

Indiana: [to Satipo] Adios, Stupido...

Indiana: Stay here.
Satipo: [shrugs] If you insist, señor.

Indiana: Too bad the Hovitos don't know you the way I do, Belloq.
Belloq: Yes, too bad. You could warn them... if only you spoke Hovitos!

Indiana: Do we need the monkey?
Marion: I'm surprised at you. Talking that way about our baby. He's got your looks, too.
Indiana: And your brains.

Indiana: There's a big snake in the plane, Jock!
Jock: Oh, that's just my pet snake Reggie.
Indiana: I hate snakes, Jock! I hate 'em!
Jock: Come on! Show a little backbone, will ya!

[as the Nazis are opening the Ark]
Indiana: Marion, don't look at it. Shut your eyes, Marion. Don't look at it, no matter what happens!

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Young Indiana Jones and the Curse of the Jackal (#1.1)" (1992)

T.E Lawrence: What happened?
Miss Seymour: We had a slight autocation with our guide.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Yeah, he ran off with the camels.
T.E Lawrence: Yes, they do that sometimes.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: I'd like to be an archaeologist.
T.E Lawrence: Maybe you'll add a new page to history. Or discover a treasure beyond price.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: And get rich!
T.E Lawrence: No, Henry. the archaeologists don't get rich. Archaeology doesn't steal from the past, it opens it. So that everyone may learn from it's treasures.

Professor Henry Jones, Sr.: [handing his son a book] Use it as a journal, or diary. Write down anything that interests or strikes you.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Thank you, father!

Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: [seeing Ned's gun for the first time] Holy smokes!
T.E Lawrence: Play up, and play the game, eh?

T.E Lawrence: Wonderful meeting you Henry, you really are a splendid chap
Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Don't go Ned.
T.E Lawrence: I'll write to you. Promise.
[leaves on bicycle]

Indiana Jones: If I don't get home, my father's gonna kill me.

Remy: What's happening in Europe? Is the war over?
Indiana Jones: Germany's still holding most of Belgium.
Remy: Bastards!

Indiana Jones: What I can't figure is, how you got here. I mean what's a Belgian doing riding with General Villa?
Remy: I was a sailor. But I hated the sea. One day we tied up at Villa Cruz, I jumped ship. Then I met Lupe. She was very beautiful. I adored her. We had a little cantina. We were very happy. But the federalists came. They destroyed our cantina. And then they killed my Lupe. But, I joined the revolution.
Indiana Jones: For revenge?
Remy: For that, and for other reasons.

Indiana Jones: [looking at a picture of T.E. 'Ned' Lawrence] I found him, Ned. I found the man who killed Rasheed. I found him at last.

Remy: What is it, Indiana? Are you sick?
Indiana Jones: Not sick exactly, I just don't think this is my revolution.

Indiana Jones: I guess I'm just seeing things clearly for the first time. This isn't my war either. Maybe the one in Europe is. That a war that has to be fought. Above all it has to be won. The alternative is... it's unthinkable.

Indiana Jones: [confronting Demetrios] Remember me? I'm a friend of Rasheed. The man you killed in Egypt.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Now I was born across the river, in New Jersey. That's right. July the first, 1899. I guess that sounds a hell of a long time ago to you, huh? But let me tell you something. To me, it deceives only the twinkling of an eye.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: [narrating] It took 9 days to sail across the mediterranean sea. I guess my mother and father had quite a good time on the voyage. I didn't get to see too much of it, though. Miss Seymour didn't let up on me for one bit of a minute. I'll say this for that woman: whe was one tough old bird.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: [narrating] From time to time I was able to explore things on my own, but... for the most part the 'Godess of Knowledge' kept my nose stuck in a book.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: [narrating] He rode like the wind. The hand of God was upon him. Don't forget me, he cried, as if I ever would. The man was a hero, even then.
First Kid: Then what happened?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Huh?
First Kid: Did he catch the killer?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: When he got to the pier, the steam ship had gone by five minutes. And Demetrios with it.
First Kid: So the bad guys got way?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Uh, not exactly.

First Kid: Aw come on, mister, we gotta know what happened.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Oh, would ya?
[chuckles]
Second Kid: Hey man, we've gotta. Come on, mister, please.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Well, alright, but I've got to get home, soon. Got to feed my cat, Henry. Very demanding creature, Henry. Makes my life hell sometimes.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: [narrating] I nearly missed meeting up with Remy. But I made it, and we slipped away. Two weeks later, we took a bout out of Vera Cruz. I was on my way to enlist in the Great War. The war to save civilization. The war to end all wars.

First Kid: Mr. Jones? What happened to the Jackal?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones Jr.: Jackal?
[points his cane at the artifact displayed behind at the musuem]

---

Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis (1992) (VG)

Indiana Jones: [complimenting Sophia] In this light you look just like Vivien Leigh.
Sophia Hapgood: Frankly Indy, I don't give a damn.

Indiana Jones: Of all the shops in Algeria and we had to walk into this one.
Sophia Hapgood: We'll always have Iceland Indy...

Arnold: [a Nazi spots Indy in the Crete labyrinth] You there, Amerikanner! Kommen zie! I won't hurt you.
[Indy walks over]
Arnold: Know any good drinking tunes?
Indiana Jones: Maybe, let me think...”Buddy, Can You Spare a Dime"?
Arnold: No, that's too depressing. Now I'll have to amuse myself by tearing your head off!
Indiana Jones: Try singing "So Long, It's Been Good To Know You"
[runs away]

Indiana Jones: [while exploring the Crete labyrinth] Some date, huh?
Sophia Hapgood: We're not dating Jones; this is not a date, if it was a date, I would've stood you up!

Indiana Jones: [Indy is making shadow puppets with a flashlight and makes a dog] Neat! Woof, woof!
Sophia Hapgood: ...Indy?
Indiana Jones: [makes an elephant] It's Jumbo! King of the Circus!
Sophia Hapgood: What do you think you're doing?
Indiana Jones: [makes a rabbit] ... and here's Nur-Ab-Sal!
Sophia Hapgood: Stop that this instant!
Indiana Jones: [turns off flashlight] ... sorry.

[Kerner steps onto the platform on the Godhood Machine]
Klaus Kerner: If anyone's going to become a god, it must be me!
Dr. Hans Ubermann: You? Don't be silly, Kerner! You're not prepared for this!
Klaus Kerner: I'm in charge of this operation, you spineless sausage!
[draws his gun]
Klaus Kerner: Activate the machine!
Dr. Hans Ubermann: [sighs] A test is a test. Plato suggested 10 beads; let's try that.
Indiana Jones: Hang on a second!
Klaus Kerner: What now, Jones?
Indiana Jones: What about Plato's tenfold error?
Klaus Kerner: What about it?
Indiana Jones: Ten beads might give you size ten antlers.
[shrugs]
Indiana Jones: Just a thought.
Klaus Kerner: Hmmm... he may be right. We should divide by ten. Try ONE bead.
Dr. Hans Ubermann: One bead it is!
[Ubermann inserts a bead into the machine and it turns on, slowly transforming Kerner]
Dr. Hans Ubermann: Himmel! It's working!
[Kerner is transformed into a small disfigured demonic creature]
Klaus Kerner: NOOOOOO!
[Kerner plunges himself into the lava]
Dr. Hans Ubermann: A small bead for a small man, eh Jones? Now it's your turn.

Hans: Hey, you!
Indiana Jones: Me?
Hans: I don't see anyone else. State your business.
Indiana Jones: I'm selling soap. And you smell like you could use some.
Hans: I'll trade you for a lesson in manners.

Indiana Jones: [subway train Indy is riding crashes through a wall] Ow.

Guard: [At door to labyrinth] You're trespassing on occupied territory. I've got orders not to let anyone pass.
Indiana Jones: I got a message for Kolonel Kerner. Let me pass.
Guard: I'll deliver it myself. What's the message?
Indiana Jones: Go tell Kerner there's an idiot guarding the door.
Guard: You need a lesson in respect mein herr!
[fight begins]

[last lines]
[looking at the volcano left after Atlantis' collapse]
Indiana Jones: You know, a lot of my discoveries seem like tall tales, even to me. At least there's some evidence now.
[the volcano promptly sinks under the surface]
Sophia Hapgood: Then again, maybe not.
[Indy suddenly kisses Sohia intently]
Sophia Hapgood: [surprised] What was that for?
Indiana Jones: To ease the pain.

[as Indy approaches Sophia, the Nazi Guard notices him]
Guard: Who are you? Talk fast, and I'd better like your tone of voice, or you're a dead man!
Indiana Jones: I'm Indiana Jones. Who are you, bucket head?
Guard: Bucket head? What kind of insult is that?
Indiana Jones: I'll let Sophia explain it to you.
[Sophia knocks out the guard with a bucket sitting behind him]

[alternate dialogue for the conversation above]
Indiana Jones: Has madame Sophia told you your future looks *pail*?
Guard: No, now that you mention it she hasn't.

Indiana Jones: [to Sophia, referring to a less-than-cooperative colleague] I think the good doctor has frostbite of the brain.

Indiana Jones: That's enough. The jar is full.

Indiana Jones: I'm back!
Klaus Kerner: You don't look at all well, Dr. Jones.
Indiana Jones: Exploring our collections can be dangerous, Mr. Uhh... what was your name again?
Klaus Kerner: Smith.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Young Indiana Jones and the Mystery of the Blues (#2.5)" (1993)

Ernest Hemingway: [referring to Elliot Ness] Where'd you get this cracker?
Indiana Jones: He came with the room.

Indiana Jones: [to Sidney Bichet] You know, I heard King Oliver play in New Orleans when I was twelve. You ever get to play with him?
[Sidney looks straight at Indy but does not answer]

Indiana Jones: You're such a square.
Eliot Ness: Why, because I need a good night's sleep?
Indiana Jones: You're the world's youngest stuffy old fart.
Eliot Ness: I am not.
Indiana Jones: I'm telling you as a pal, you're a seventy year old kid. You need to loosen up. Now get your coat.

Indiana Jones: [Eliot has been knocked down] Eliot, get up!
Eliot Ness: I lost my beanie!

Indiana Jones: [about Sidney] How'd he get so good?
Goldie: It's kinda like they say: the more a man has to say, the more complicated his music gets. Sidney ain't easy. He's creo. He's too colored for the whites and not colored enough for the negros. So he don't belong either place. I think he's trying to find a place in the music.

Eliot Ness: [Indy is practicing his soprano sax] How bout you trying to play a tune?
Indiana Jones: Eliott, this is jazz, there are no rules, it just flows.
Eliot Ness: Well, just flow somewhere else

Indiana Jones: Sorry I wasted your time.
Piano Man: It wasn't a waste of time, kid. A good laugh is never a waste of time.

Indiana Jones: [about having to kill during the war] One's enough too remember. It's that split second when you're alive and because of you someone else is dead. You got lucky. They didn't. So many didn't.

Indiana Jones: I thought the blues was jazz?
Sidney Bichet: The blues is the blues. It's got it's own sound.
Piano Man: I call it the wannabe sound.
Trumpet player: I call it nobody appreciates how good I am sound.

Ernest Hemingway: Hey, you look like a waiter.
Indiana Jones: I am a waiter. What are you doing here?
Ernest Hemingway: Oh, just trying to get a story, you know, put a patato on my plate. I'm at the Chicago Trib now.

Mr O'Bannion: Roses or Tulips?
Indiana Jones: Sir?
Mr O'Bannion: It's for a funeral. Which would you prefer, Mr Hemingway?
Ernest Hemingway: [deviant laugh] Well I'm a sucker for daisies.

Grey Cloud: Good driving.
Indiana Jones - age 50: This is not my first time, you know.

GreyCloud: [looking at the Indian pipe] This is probably the most sacred relic in my people's past.
Indiana Jones - age 50: [having found a soprano sax] Well here's a sacred relic of my past.

Indiana Jones - age 50: Reminds me of working my way through the University of Chicago.
Grey Cloud: You playing that?
Indiana Jones - age 50: No... no, I was a waiter.
[narrating as the scene shifts to Chicago, 1920]
Indiana Jones - age 50: But that's an art in it self. You know, you don't start at the top. You work your way up. Perfect your style. Till you are at the top, like Colosimo's Restaurant. The best food, the best service and the best jazz in Chicago. I was crazy about jazz.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: London, May 1916 (#1.2)" (1992)

Recruiting Sergeant: [browsing the form Indy has just filled in] Henri Defence. Name of father, Henri Defence also... name of mother Anna Jones. Your parents are not married?
Indiana Jones: Oui, non, oui, oui, oui.

Lady Lavinia: Typical of these suffragettes. Always abusing and bullyragging anyone who disagrees with them. Even a war widow.
Indiana Jones: Sorry. I wish there was something I could do.
Lady Lavinia: How kind you are. One feels so lost and lonely
Indiana Jones: You're so beautiful I wouldn't think you'd ever be lonely...

Indiana Jones: Is that a zeppelin?
[bombs start exploding as they hit the streets of London]
Vicky Prentiss: No, it's a time traveler form the 21st century coming to see if we're alright. Come on, move!

Indiana Jones: Are you alright?
Vicky Prentiss: Yes of course. If we give up every time a bomb falls anywere near us, we're never gonna win.

Indiana Jones: So, do you always give your passengers such an exciting ride?
Vicky Prentiss: Oh no, they don't all insult lady passengers and end up on the floor of the bus.

Rough Man: [heckling a suffragette on stage] If you was my wife, you'd be lucky to get a penny.
Indiana Jones: [stands up] Hey, if you were her husband, she'd need all the luck she could get!

Indiana Jones: Do you come to many of these meetings?
Vicky Prentiss: When I can, why? Don't you approve?
Indiana Jones: I like people who stand up for their rights. I've fought for the peasants in Mexico.
Vicky Prentiss: Really? What a busy life you've led.

Indiana Jones: What language is that?
Vicky Prentiss: You mean your name is Jones, yet you don't speak Welsh?

Vicky Prentiss: Thank heaven you thought of calling it a loan.
Indiana Jones: My mother taught me when we were in China that it is very important for people to save face, even if they are starving.

Indiana Jones: [about Miss Seymour] She's... It's kind of hard to explain. She's almost family. Since my mother died, she knows me better than anyone else.

Miss Seymour: How long will you be in La Havre?
Indiana Jones: Not long I guess. They keep the training short these days.
Miss Seymour: And mind you write to me. And to your father.
Indiana Jones: I will.
Miss Seymour: And please, Henry, don't take any stupid risks just to show off.
Indiana Jones: I'll try not to.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: That voice reminds me of the time I was in London in 1916.
[narrating as the scene dissolves]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I arrived with my friend Remy. We first met in Mexico but he was Belgian. And he'd come to join the Belgian Army, so he could fight the Germans who had invaded his country two years earlier.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [about Vicky] I never saw her again. I still have the ticket to that bus ride.
[shows it to Bob Traynor]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Yeah, She was right. If we had met after the war, we would have been two different people.

Older Vicky: Come along dears, deeds, not words.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Vicky?

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Young Indiana Jones and the Phantom Train of Doom (#2.11)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: Look at that sunset.
Remy: It's beautiful. It's magnificent. It's... in the wrong place!

Donald Parks: You don't appear to know much about trains.
Indiana Jones: Well, actually, I know a lot about trains. I spend my summers working shoveling coal on trains but that really doesn't teach you much about time tables here in the middle of Africa.

Donald Parks: I don't suppose you speak German?
Indiana Jones: Ich spreche viele sprache.

Indiana Jones: Six days?
Big Mac: Son, the good Lord made the world in six days, what's blowing up a cannon compared to that?

Indiana Jones: I can't believe we're risking our lives for toilet paper.
Donald Parks: Leave no outhouse unplundered.

Indiana Jones: [expecting an explosion] What happened?
Birdy: Nothing.
Indiana Jones: [shouting] I know nothing happened!

Indiana Jones: [putting on a shoveler's uniform] Ok, what do I do when I get there?
Frederick Selous: Do you always have to have a plan?
Indiana Jones: It helps!

Frederick Selous: What are you doing?
Indiana Jones: We're going back, aren't we? We can't let them have that gun.
Frederick Selous: [Donald gives a thumbs up] Yes, of course. You wait for my orders next time.

Indiana Jones: What, are you crazy? That's got to be five hundred yards. Nobody could make that shot.
Donald Parks: Not true. I'd say there are at least... three people in the world who could.
Frederick Selous: [taking aim] I used to be the best shot in Africa once... according to you.

Remy: Look what you've got me into!
Indiana Jones: Oh great, so now suddenly it's all my fault?
Remy: It's not suddenly your fault, it's always been your fault!

Remy: [finally catching on to Selous' plan] It's a kidnapping!
Indiana Jones: You had this planned all along.
Frederick Selous: Of course.
Indiana Jones: But why drag us into it?
Frederick Selous: I needed you. You're my good luck.

Gen. Jan Christian Smuts: I suggest you patch those holes.
Indiana Jones: We did kidnap my father. It's a nightmare!

Indiana Jones: So why do the British want you so badly?
Colonel Paul von Lettow-Vorbeck: I'm a military genius.
Indiana Jones: [suppressing laughter] There's no sense of being modest.
Colonel Paul von Lettow-Vorbeck: No.

Indiana Jones: Nice shot.
Margaret Trappe: I was aiming at your head.
Indiana Jones: Well then I take it back.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Paris, October 1916 (#2.16)" (1993)

Remy: Who is she? What is she like?
Indiana Jones: She's incredible.
Remy: They all are, what else?
Indiana Jones: Incredible is enough, for the moment.
Genevieve: Too bad that moment doesn't last.

Prof. Levi: [reading a letter from Indy's father] You may inform him that I greatly encourage him to renew his educational pursuits at the university of his choice. He need no longer concern himself about my view in this matter.
Indiana Jones: I don't have to go to Princeton?

Indiana Jones: [to Mata Hari] I've seen the palace dancers of Raj and Punjaab and... they don't compare to your extraordinary gift.

Mata Hari: Your youth is so intoxicating.
Indiana Jones: You're making fun of me.

Mata Hari: A smart boy like you should transfer to Africa. I hear that the war is much safer there.
Indiana Jones: I hear it's much safer right here in your bed.
Mata Hari: Only for you, I think.

Remy: Have you fallen in love again?
Indiana Jones: No, not exactly. I mean it's not like it was with Vicky. I'm not really in love...
Genevieve: He's in heat!
[they all burst out laughing]

Mata Hari: You're cute when you're angry.
Indiana Jones: Don't say that, puppy's are cute.

Indiana Jones: I never understood why people change their names.
Mata Hari: Is Henri Defence your real name?
Indiana Jones: Not exactly.

Policeman #1: Corporal Defence. That's a strange name. You're American, are you not?
Indiana Jones: Yes sir, I am.
Policeman #1: You also go by the name of Henry Jones Jr.
Indiana Jones: Yes I do.
Policeman #2: Je suis ques le nomme de 'Indiana Jones'.
Policeman #1: And also Indiana Jones?
Indiana Jones: Yes sir.
Policeman #1: That's a very odd name. Why aren't you using your real name? What are you hiding?
Indiana Jones: Nothing!
Policeman #1: It says here that you're a Belgian. Did you lie about that?

Indiana Jones: I can't believe you kissed that old goat.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Till the end, she thought that one of her Prince Charming's would come to rescue her. I'll always be sorry it couldn't have been me.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: In my years I have found that sometimes truth is more fantastic than what you read here. Why, I remember when I was in France during the Great War. I was on leave from the front and as a young man I felt I had to to try to squeeze as much life as I possibly could into those few precious days away from battlefields and death. What I was looking for, was a sweeter, softer kinder of adventure.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: As I crossed the street I knew that I would probably never see her again. Little did I know that in less than a year, she'd be blowing a kiss to the firing squad.
Supermarket Woman: Was she really a spy?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I don't know. No one knew for sure. I don't think she even knew.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: German East Africa, December 1916 (#1.5)" (1992)

Major Boucher: You're in command now, It's up to you to get the guns through.
Indiana Jones: I won't let you down, sir.
Major Boucher: Course you will. Your soft, undisciplined. No fit to command men.

Dutchman: You boys look like you crawled through hell on your bellies.
Indiana Jones: We didn't crawl.

Indiana Jones: Just think of it as a little hike.
Remy: A hike he says. I'd rather go back in the trenches than go back in that jungle.

Major Boucher: Next time you disobey my commands, I'll skin you alive and feed you to the hyena's. Clear?
Indiana Jones: As a bell, sir.
Major Boucher: You have the devil's luck. I hope it holds. We could all use some of it on this trip.

Remy: [leading Indy into Barthelemy's tent] Congratulations, it's a boy.
Indiana Jones: Oh my God, he brought the kid.

Indiana Jones: [holding a gun to his commanding officer's head] You're being irrational. Emotions are clouding your judgement. You're endangering the men and putting our mission at risk.
Major Boucher: This is mutiny, Captain.
Indiana Jones: I disagree. Now drop your weapon. It's not a request.
Major Boucher: I'll have you before a firing squad. All of you.

Indiana Jones: [narrating] As we cross this country, we leave a trail of corpes in our wake like Hansel and Gretel leaving a trail of breadcrumbs.

Indiana Jones: [to Barthelemy] Sergeant, under no circumstances are you given leave to die. That's an order. One I expect you to obey for a change.

White Nun: Was he the boy's father?
Indiana Jones: He was his friend. Now the boy has nobody. You speak Ubangi?
Black Nun: Yes I do.
Indiana Jones: Tell him that his friend loved him and he must never forget what his friend said: don't be afraid to grow strong and wise. Make your people proud. Will you tell him that, sister?

Mike: I'm sorry I ever met you.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I have that effect on people.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now Listen to me you little snot, You never know how people are going to turn out or what, what changes the'll make in the world. I know. I remember. I was in the first world war.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] My friend Remy and I, we has spend five months in the European trenches and we thought anything would be an improvement. So we transferred to Africa where we both received commissions as lieutenants.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: When he was old enough, I wrote to him about our sargeant and his dreams for the future.
Mike: So what's the point?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: What?
Mike: You make me sit through this whole, long story and there's no point? But the missionary's raised him, he got an education, he became the first president of the Central African republic, the father of his country. Barthelemy Boganda. You can read about him in the history books

---

The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Travels with Father (1996) (TV)

Anna Jones: Your father will deal with you in the morning.
Indiana Jones: What's he gonna do?
Anna Jones: Have you shot in the morning. I will provide the blindfold.

Leo Tolstoy: You reeking little swine, how dare you shoot me in the ass!
Indiana Jones: I thought you were a giant weazle.
Leo Tolstoy: Do I look like a giant weazle? Is it my twitching snout? My long, hairless tail? Are all little English boys as stupid as you?
Indiana Jones: I'm not English, I'm American.
Leo Tolstoy: That explains it.

Indiana Jones: You have dogs? So do I. One I mean, her name's Indiana. I haven't seen her in over a year, though. 'Cause we've been traveling so much.
Leo Tolstoy: You miss her?
Indiana Jones: Yeah, you bet I do. Can't wait to see her when we get home. Wonder if she'll still remember me.
Leo Tolstoy: Of course she will. Dogs are better than people.

Indiana Jones: Hey, they were calling you Tolstoy. I think my father has some of your books. Didn't you write that eh, that really big fat one about war?
Leo Tolstoy: And peace.
Indiana Jones: No kiddin'. My father thinks you're great!
Leo Tolstoy: Your dads an imbicile.
Indiana Jones: He's usually not wrong about this stuff. You should ask him.

Indiana Jones: Father, I don't think that he understand your ancient Greek.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: Well he should have understood it.

Indiana Jones: Father, I really doubt if a bus is even gonna come and if it does, there's probably only one a day and, and it's probably already gone!
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: Junior, you are now being cynical.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: [beneath his breath] Yes sir.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: See, after skeptsism comes cynicism.

Indiana Jones: [Indy and his father are splashing around in a lake] I didn't even know you could swim.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: There's a lot you don't know about me, Junior.
[splashes water at his son]
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: When I was five years old, I used to go swimming in a loch. Now that was cold!

Indiana Jones: [Indy and his father are splashing around in a lake] Father!
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: What?
Indiana Jones: You know how you said that we should let ourselves be consumed by nature?
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: Yes.
Indiana Jones: Well, nature is consuming our clothes.

Indiana Jones: So your name's Aristotle?
Artistotle: Yes. So my wife said: Aristotle, she said, if you don't call that donkey Plato, you gonna have noone to talk to
[laughs riotously]

Artistotle: Hey, are you interested in politics?
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: No not much.
Artistotle: Ah, then you're an idiot.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: [brief pause] Thank you, Aristotle.
Artistotle: My pleasure.
[laughs]
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: No, he's right, Junior. Our word 'idiot' comes from a Greek word which means 'one who is not interested in politics'.
Indiana Jones: Yeah, I, I'll remember that.

Indiana Jones: I'm bored.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: Bored? Bored? We're sitting in one of the most fascinating libraries in this part of the world and you're bored?
Indiana Jones: It's also the only library.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: I will not have you bored.

Indiana Jones: But what causes nature?
Nikos Kazantzakis: Bravo. That is a question that comes from wisdom and not from logic. You have found the question your father hoped he would find.
Indiana Jones: I, I did?
Nikos Kazantzakis: You see, God, the unmoved mover, the prime cause, God dances beyond the bounds of logic.

Indiana Jones: A ladder is made of wood, right?
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: Yes.
Indiana Jones: This cage is made out of wood.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: So?
Indiana Jones: Ergo, our cage is a ladder.
Prof. Henry Jones, Sr.: That's not what I call Aristotlian logic.
Indiana Jones: We need a ladder, father. Let's turn our cage into a ladder.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Vienna, November 1908 (#2.9)" (1993)

Princess Sophie: My English is nicht good.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Probably better than my German.
Princess Sophie: Yes, it is.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Who wrote this?
Miss Seymour: Sir Thomas Wyatt, 1503 to 1542.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: All that time ago and that man felt just like me?
Miss Seymour: He was in love. Literature has tried to come to terms with these emotions for many centuries, Henry.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Mother?
Anna Jones: Yes?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Did father ever give you a gift when you were courting?
Anna Jones: Why yes, em, a locket. I still wear it.

Sigmund Freud: I suppose that romantic love was invented as a brilliant means of seduction.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Love was invented?
Sigmund Freud: Yes. And that was the beginning of the end, young man.

Kurt: It was foolish of you to come here uninvited. The guards are trained marksmen able to kill great distance. The dogs are trained to kill as well.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I wasn't scared.
Kurt: You should have been.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Sir, I believe your daughter to be in danger.
Franz Ferdinand: Why?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Because it is dangerous to deny our feelings of love.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Indiana Jones in an old peoples home! It's inconceivable!

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: My children think I'm crazy, I know I'm not. So I'd appreciate your giving me a test to prove the fact.

Carol: Is there, eh, any history of mental illness in your family?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [suppressing a laugh] Well, that's a matter of opinion.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: It was 1908. I was nine years old, and the world was just as insane then as it is now. And 1908 was the year of the first psycho-analytical conference, which my father decided to attend. Problems often start in places of great beauty...

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I guess she never got any of my letters, I certainly never got any from her. But then, the world turned out to be a much crueler place than either of us could have imagined at that time. I suppose I was always getting stuck up some tree trying to rescue cats. But that doesn't mean I'm crazy, does it?

Carol: Tell me something, Mr. Jones, did you ever see her again?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: 'Course I did, but that's another story.
[leaves the office]

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Young Indiana Jones and the Scandal of 1920 (#2.8)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: Who are all these people?
Kate: Writers, actors, painters, composers, anarchists, socialists. The usual village crowd. Do you know any of them?
Indiana Jones: Me? No, no, I just snuck in for some free food. Who's party is this, anyway?
Kate: Mine.

Mack: As far as I'm concerned, you're an idiot.
[louder]
Mack: What are you?
Indiana Jones: I'm an idiot.
Mack: Correct. Now open your idiot ears and follow me.
[they walk through a door and go backstage]
Mack: You're job is to do all the idiot jobs that only an idiot wants to do. Like make the coffee, run the errants, scrape the stage.

Indiana Jones: [about Gloria] She looks... eatable.
George Gershwin: She should. Her old man owns the biggest meat packing plant in New Jersey.

Mack: Excuse me, Mr. Jones, I just hate to disturb you, but your lunch date's arrived...
Indiana Jones: But it's not even noon.
Mack: [shouting] And her damn limo is blocking half the damn street!

Franklin Adams: Oh Mr. Jones, Tell me, have you forgiven your parents yet?
Indiana Jones: What for?
Franklin Adams: For naming you after the dullest state in the union.
Indiana Jones: Actually, I named myself, after my dog.

George Gershwin: Can't you at least give one of them up?
Indiana Jones: But which one? Not Peggy... not Kate...
George Gershwin: And not Gloria, her old man's backing the show!

New York Cabbie: Men are scum.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: All of them?
New York Cabbie: All of 'em!
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Perhaps you're looking for perfection.
New York Cabbie: Perfection? Mister, I gave up on that a long time ago.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Ah, the theater. Thank goodness I'm not late, eh?
New York Cabbie: Aw, mister, come on, please, don't give me a hard time, just tell me what happened.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: How much is on the meter?
New York Cabbie: 37 dollars.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I can't afford to tell you.
[exits the cab]
New York Cabbie: Men.
[shouting]
New York Cabbie: You're all the same!

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I see you're writing your review already.
Theatre Critic: You recognize me?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: No, but I know a damn critic when I see one.
[grabs the critic's notepad]
Theatre Critic: Hey!

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now you listen to me, my friend, cause I know whereof I speak. Now. I was once involved in putting on a show. George White's Scandals. The year was 1920. When Broadway was really Broadway and shows were really shows.

Theatre Critic: You know something? I'm going to give this show a wonderful review.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: A wonderful review? This crap? What are you, insane?
Theatre Critic: But, but what about all the young people?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: They should be ashamed of themselves. They should quit!

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Ireland, April 1916 (#2.12)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: [taking in the Irish countryside] This is certainly more colorful than Mexico.
Remy: That's for sure!

Maggie Lemass: How many countries have you visited?
Indiana Jones: Well, most of Europe, then Africa, India, China...
Nuala: Isn't that where all the little boys wear pigtails?
Indiana Jones: Well, not just the boys, the men too.
Maggie Lemass: [the girls giggle] Holy Mary!

Sean O'Casey: Political! Legendary! Hairy fairy old bollocks!
Indiana Jones: He said he like your play.
Sean O'Casey: He did not! He said it was challenging. Challenging! That's only one step up from interesting. The last bloody thing any writer wants to hear.

Sean O'Casey: It's a bosses war you're fighting. You're going to be killed in the name of capitalist gain.
Indiana Jones: We'll try not to.
Sean O'Casey: Ah, the hell with ye! Good luck.

Sean O'Casey: Will you be comin' back?
Indiana Jones: I hope so.
Sean O'Casey: Better take a good look then. Because you'll never recognize her. The old Ireland's changed.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [about his favorite soap opera] I've got to find out if Ralph is Maud's lover, or her twin brother in disguise...

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now there are times when life is just like theater. You know where I learned that?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [she shakes her head] In Ireland.
Indy's daughter: Oh, dad, we've got to go.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: No, no, no wait, I'm just getting started.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now, I was on my way to London with my friend Remy. We were gonna join the Belgian army, you see. Now a boat took us to Queenstown and we landed there. It was April, just a little before Easter, 1916.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: He was right. Old Ireland was never the same again. But Sean Lemass was not shot, no sir, he survived and went on to become prime minister of Ireland.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Well, what about my show?
Indy's daughter: It finished ages ago.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Finished? Oh, damnation, why didn't you stop me?
Indy's daughter: No one's ever been able to do that, dad.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Germany, Mid-August 1916 (#2.3)" (1992)

Indiana Jones: [Emile and Indy have aquired the uniforms of two dead officers] I'm Lieutenant Piere Blanc from Paris.
Emile: Captain Francois Toussaint from Lyon. At last I outrank you. Maybe I wil have you shine my boots, yes?
Indiana Jones: Don't count on it.

Charles De Gaulle: I am lecturing on medieval military tactics.
Indiana Jones: Why medieval tactics?
Charles De Gaulle: I beg your pardon?
Indiana Jones: Well, if French and English generals would have studied the American civil war, we would've beaten the Germans by know.
Charles De Gaulle: A bold statement lieutenant.

Indiana Jones: Do you hate the Germans?
Charles De Gaulle: They are the natural enemy of France. We fought them in 1817, we fight them now, and this I guarantee you, corporal, before this century is over we will fight them again.

Indiana Jones: Now what should we do?
Charles De Gaulle: What we always do: keep trying.

Indiana Jones: The only way out of here is in a coffin.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You can't keep me here.
Policeman #1: Yeah?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: There's no prison made that can hold me. I knew Houdini! You wait 'till my lawyer gets back from lunch.
Policeman #2: Good luck, old man.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [addressing his cellmates] Alright boys, who's got an escape plan. No plan?

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I've busted out of prisons designed by the most creative minds...
Greasy Inmate: What are you in for, old timer? Boring someone to death?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Oh, heh, you don't believe me huh? This cracker box ain't nothing. The Germans. Now they built prisons. When I was serving in the Belgian army during the Great War, I was captured just North of the Somme. After a very terrible battle. Many of my friends were dead and some of them missing. I was lucky. But I didn't know how long it would last...

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: So, I ran across the German countryside as though the devil himself were on my tail. At last I spotted this lovely farm house among the hills...
Inmate #2: [banging on the door] Officer! Get this old guy out of here.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Told you boys I'd be out in an hour!

---

The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Hollywood Follies (1994) (TV)

Indiana Jones: Where do I come in?
Carl Laemmle: You don't come in. You go out.
Indiana Jones: Go out, where?
Carl Laemmle: To Hollywood. As my personal representative. I want you to get out there and take charge. Tell that lunatic Von Stroheim he finishes the picture in ten days, or else you pull the plugs.

Indiana Jones: Excuse me, sir, do you know Universal Studios?
Cabbie: The funny farm? Yeah, who doesn't!

Indiana Jones: Listen, I'm getting tired of horsing around.
Erich Von Stroheim: Von Stoheim never horses around.

Indiana Jones: Who the heck is Prince Massimo?
Irving Thalberg: A real Italian prince Von Stoheim brought in specially.
Claire Lieberman: Von loves his accent.
Indiana Jones: Loves his accent, but, but, but, but there's no sound! These are silent pictures, send him back!

John Ford: Indy? Where'd you get a name like that, from your dog?
Indiana Jones: Yeah, as a matter of fact, I did.
John Ford: Well, I suppose it's as good a name as Ford.

Kitty: Talk is cheap in this business, kid.
Indiana Jones: Yeah, maybe you're right.
Kitty: Of course I'm right. Couple of years you'll be digging up some Egyptian Pharao's tomb and you won't even be thinking about her.

Edwin: [laughs] I've never seen run so fast as when you saw that snake
Indiana Jones: I hate snakes.
Edwin: What are you afraid of?
Indiana Jones: It's a long story.

Claire Lieberman: Do you always write like this?
Indiana Jones: What do you mean?
Claire Lieberman: [sighs before starting to read his letter] No one can stop me loving you, Clair, but I'm just not the right man for you. You need someone steady, reliable and smart. Like old Tony. I nearly vomited over my waffles when I read this.

Claire Lieberman: Are you sure you don't want to stay, Indy?
Indiana Jones: [walking with crutches] I think I'll stick to archeology. Safer.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Austria, March 1917 (#2.1)" (1992)

Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: That's the trick cyclist we passed on the way in. We thought he was an errant boy.
Indiana Jones: That's captain errant boy to you, second lieutenant. And unless you're dressed for a masquerade I fully expect to be saluted.

Indiana Jones: How will I find this Schultz?
Major Delon: Schultz will find you.

Indiana Jones: German spies don't concern me so much. All they do is shoot us. Its the Austrian secret police that worries me more.
Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: And what would they do?
Indiana Jones: Poke our eyes out, strip our flesh, feed us our innerts, for starters.

Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: Now what?
Indiana Jones: Now we make contact with Schultz. Or rather, he makes contact with us.
Xavier: I wonder what this Schultz looks like?
Indiana Jones: I can't tell. I'm sure he's a master of disguise.
Schultz: I'm Schultz.
Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: [recognizing the plump lady from the train] You're right, he is a master of disguise.
Schultz: This is no time for jokes. There is danger. Follow me.

Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: Well, Lieutenant. Unless you're dressed for a masquerade, we fully expect to be saluted.
Indiana Jones: Don't press your royal luck.

Indiana Jones: I've got a bad feeling about this.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: And that's how we got the emperor's letter out of Austia. Sadly though, the Kaiser got wind of what the emperor was up to. He called the kid in on the carpet, gave 'em a real dressing down. I don't know what pressure he applied, or what force he used, but he forced emperor Karl to go back on his promise. So, the war dragged on for another year. A few more million lives were lost. Karl's prediction came true: the thousand year monarchy crumbled. He was the last emperor of Austria.
Postal Woman: What a drag!

Postal Woman: [old Indy is grabbing around in a US mail box] Once you dropped something in that box, it becomes the property of the U.S. government until delivery.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Oh, dear me. I haven't had so much trouble delivering a package since the incident in Viena back when I was a spy.
Postal Woman: Spy? You mean like James Bond?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I mean a real spy in the war!
Postal Woman: What war?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: World War One. Of course we didn't number it back at the time, because we had no idea there was gonna be a sequel.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [to female postal worker] You know, I've always had a thing for ladies in uniform.
[she laughs]

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Transylvania, January 1918 (#2.22)" (1993)

Colonel Waters: There is little honor amongst spies.
Indiana Jones: Then it will be my pleasure.
Colonel Waters: There is even less of that.

Colonel Waters: British, French and American soldiers laughing it up with Germans and Austrians? For Christ sake, don't they know there's a war on?
Indiana Jones: Or maybe the war ended and they forgot to tell us.

Dr. Franz Heinzer: The electrical impulses in the body's central nervous system can literally overheat and the flesh ignites from within.
Indiana Jones: You're kidding, right?
Dr. Franz Heinzer: I am merely stating the scientific possibilities.

General Targo: Good evening, Captain Jones.
Indiana Jones: How do you know my name?
General Targo: This is my home. I know all that goes on under it's roof.

Indiana Jones: [spits out Targo's sleeping potion] I don't like to drink on an empty stomach!

Maria: We have to kill him.
Indiana Jones: What are you talking about, he's already dead. We have to get out of here.
Maria: No, he will live. You must know that now.
Indiana Jones: No one could survive that fall.
Maria: No man could.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You don't believe in ghosts?
Kid #1, Kid #2, Kid #3: [shaking their heads] No.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Well neither did I, until one day before the end of the Great War...

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] Now I had been in the spy business for several years now, but nothing I had done previously prepared me for the disquieting challenge I was about to face.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now do you believe in ghosts?
Kid #1, Kid #2, Kid #3: No.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [suddenly sporting fake vampire teeth and blood on his chin] I want your blood!

---

Indiana Jones and the Emperor's Tomb (2003) (VG)

Indiana Jones: [upon encountering the saw trap in Prague] In times like this, I realize that I should've kept that teaching job.

Marshall Kai, Ch'in Shi-Huang-Ti: My apologies, Doctor Jones. My partner is cursed with a vivid imagination and an impetuous tongue.
Indiana Jones: Reminds me of my last date.

Wu Han: The Black Dragon Fortress is located at the peak of those mountains.
Indiana Jones: I don't suppose they have an elevator.
Wu Han: No, but there is a gondola system that runs throughout the entire complex.
Indiana Jones: It can't be that easy.
Wu Han: It's not. The system is located in the middle of a Nazi submarine base.
Indiana Jones: Figures.

Indiana Jones: [every time Indy finds a secret artifact] I'm gonna be a rich man... if I ever get out of this alive.

Indiana Jones: I think someone just stepped on my grave.

Von Beck: Guten tag, Doctor Jones. A beautiful day for a swim, is it not? I would join you, but I'm afriad I have forgotten my bathing suit.
Indiana Jones: No problem. I can lend you mine. It's back at the hotel.
Von Beck: [laughs] The famous American sense of humor. I never really understood it.

Indiana Jones: Have I ever mentioned how absolutely stunning you look in that dress?
Mei Ying: It's the third time you've mentioned it, Doctor Jones.

Indiana Jones: Not bad. Sometimes, I impress even myself.

[repeated line]
Indiana Jones: I have a bad feeling about this.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Northern Italy, June 1918 (#2.10)" (1993)

Giulietta: Your, eh, mission, was it dangerous?
Indiana Jones: A little. But I don't think of danger.
Giulietta: No?
Indiana Jones: All I think of, is... is you.

Ernest Hemingway: Hey, love is like war, Indy. To the victor go the spoils, huh? Hey you got to try some of this local drappa.
[pours them both a drink]
Ernest Hemingway: It'll knock the enamel off your teeth. To love and war!
Indiana Jones: To love and war.

Indiana Jones: [quite tipsy] Spain is great. You're gonna love it. The wine is strong, the women are beautiful, and in Pamplone at fiesta time, they run the bulls right through the street.
[they laugh]
Ernest Hemingway: Yeah, I gotta go there someday.

Indiana Jones: [trying out all his charm on Giulietta] My darling, in this big crazy world for two people like us, there's so little time...

Ernest Hemingway: Hm, ah! I got it!
Indiana Jones: What?
Ernest Hemingway: You write her a letter. I mean you write the greatest darn love letter that was ever written.
Indiana Jones: No, I can't write letters like that.
Ernest Hemingway: Come on, the heck you can!
Indiana Jones: No, the last letter I wrote was to Arabia. And it was to a guy.

Ernest Hemingway: [about Giulietta] Who ever she chooses gets her.
Indiana Jones: Yeah, and the loser butts out.
Ernest Hemingway: Oh, start booking your ticket, cream puffs!
Indiana Jones: Yeah, start packing your bags, you big ape!

Indiana Jones: How are your legs?
Ernest Hemingway: Oh heh... well, apart from 227 holes and a ton of Austrian scrapnell, I'm dandy. At least so the doc says.
Indiana Jones: Well you got your medal.
Ernest Hemingway: Yeah.
Indiana Jones: First American to be wounded in Italy.
Ernest Hemingway: Yeah, I guess that's something

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now gentlemen, gentlemen, calm down, calm down. You're both so busy fighting each other, that you forgot what you were fighting about. That's why you both lost out.
[chuckles]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: This remind me of the time when I was in Italy...

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: That day, they shipped me out to Rome. Which I guess in the circumstances is just as well. So you see, it doesn't pay to fight over something when you lose sight of what it is you're fighting for. It's like life, gentlemen, don't be in such an all fired hurry that you don't take time to smell the flowers along the way.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Petrograd, July 1917 (#2.7)" (1993)

Brossard: You think so much of yourself, Defense. Why should he send you out in the field instead of me?
Indiana Jones: Because I'm a natural field agent, Brossard, and you're a natural... desk clerk.
Brossard: The only way you'd be any use in the field would be if they made you into a scarecrow.

Rosa: Indy, there's a Mozart recital on at the conservatory this evening. They're playing the concerto number for clarinet number...
Indiana Jones: A clarinet concerto? Rosa, you know the way right ot my heart!

Indiana Jones: Rosa, I like you so much, you're smart and funny and pretty, but love is a weird thing. It's kinda like lightning. You can no more make it strike than you can stop it when it decides to hit you.
Rosa: And you haven't been struck.

Indiana Jones: [pleased with himself] Brossard may be totally wrong in most of his analysis, but he is right to mention Lenin. If you wanna know what's going on in this revolution, follow Lenin.

Indiana Jones: You're a good desk man, Brossard. But I need to get out in the real world.
Brossard: Is that so, Captain?
Indiana Jones: You see, I like doing things. Not reading about them.

Laurentine: Captain Defense, Captain Brossard, report at once to the crisis room above the ambassador's office.
Indiana Jones: Crisis room? I didn't even know we had a...
Laurentine: We just opened one. The Bolshevik uprising began an hour ago.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [pointing at a historical picture in a museum] See that kid holding the banner there? When this picture was made, that kid had exactly 30 seconds to live.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] I was there at the time, working for French Intelligence. You know what my job was? Making sure Lenin didn't come to power. Because if anybody wanted to stop Lenin, it was the French.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Four hundred people died that day before they realized the revolution wasn't happening. Lenin fled and the Bolshevik's were smashed. Not for long, thought. That was summer. The summer of hope. By October things were different. But, October was a long way off.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [pointing at the picture] See that blur there, on the left? I reckon that must be me.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Congo, January 1917 (#1.6)" (1992)

Remy: Damn the French. Don't they know we are fighting on the same side?
Indiana Jones: We'll make do without them.

Indiana Jones: You're German.
Albert Schweitzer: You're perceptive.
Indiana Jones: Then I'm your prisoner?
Albert Schweitzer: I'm sorry, I can't accept your surrender. We simply haven't the facilities.

Indiana Jones: Why didn't you say something when you boarded the boat?
Joseph: You seemed in no mood to listen. Besides, I had more immediate concerns. Like not being blown into small bloody fragments of my former self. I do apologize for punching your face so profoundly. I am dazed with regret.
Indiana Jones: It's alright. I forgive you.
Joseph: [smiles] I am greatly relieved.

Indiana Jones: It figures I'd find you in bed. What's this slacking off?
Remy: The doctor told you I lost two toes?
[Indy nods]
Remy: That leaves eight. More than enough to kick your butt up around your ears.

Indiana Jones: But... what can you possibly hope to accomplish? This whole continent is festering with disease. What you're doing, is like trying to hold back a tidal wave.
Albert Schweitzer: I see it more as, ehm, gathering pebbles from a beach. I couldn't carry them all, of course, but I can certainly carry a handful each day. And each pebble I save has value. Well, I saved you, nicht wahr?

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: That little girl with the gunshot wound, will she make it?
Paramedic #2: Well, it's been touch and go. We've done all we can for her. We'll just have to wait and see if the vital signs stabilize. What seems to be the problem?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Rather trivial compared to that. My foot's swollen. I was stung on the toe by a bee.

Paramedic #2: I feel like that little Dutch boy trying to plug holes with my fingers while the whole dam collapses around me.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I met a Dutch boy like you once, German actually. He was in Africa during the first World War.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] Through a stroke of good luck I was made a captain in the Belgian army. Then, through a stroke of bad luck I was send on an impossible mission across the heart of Africa.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] Sometimes our light goes out, but it's blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light. Albert Schweitzer said that. As I stood on the dock, watching Sweitzer and his wife be taken back to Europe as prisoners of war, I reflected on the very deep truth of what Remy had said. He'd been right all along: it was a fools errant.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [cut back to the present day Indy in the hospital] The hospital was reclaimed by the jungle. It vanished entirely as if it had never existed. But after the war, Schweitser came back to Africa and started again. He built another hospital, bigger and better than the last. He never stopped gathering those pebbles.

---

The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Daredevils of the Desert (1999) (V)

Indiana Jones: [about the rugby match] Too bad I got pounded by British artillery. Now I know how the Turks feel.

T.E. Lawrence: There's a well at Beersheba called the well of Abraham.
Indiana Jones: Do you think Abraham used it?
T.E. Lawrence: Bible says that he brought his flocks out of the desert and watered them there, which in a way is what you have to do.
Indiana Jones: Only I'm no Abraham, and those soldiers aren't sheep.
T.E. Lawrence: Well some of the generals think they are.

Indiana Jones: What's it like, the desert?
T.E. Lawrence: It's like nowhere else on this Earth. It's the most terrible place there is. And the most wonderful.

Indiana Jones: This is a pretty good rabbit.
Jack Anders: Oh, it's nothing compared to what we got in Australia. In Australia we've got rabbita as big as kangaroos.
Indiana Jones: Really?
Jack Anders: And kangaroos as big as horses.
Indiana Jones: As big as horses, is that right?
Jack Anders: My old man saw one once, big as an elephant...
Indiana Jones: An elephant? You don't say.
Jack Anders: Well, If you'd ever been to Australia, you'd know what I was talking about.
Indiana Jones: Well actually, I have been to Australia and the kangaroos they looked pretty normal sized to me.

Greasy man: We are merciful men. You may go.
Indiana Jones: [posing as a traveling salesman] Oh, praise be from Allah, lord.
Greasy man: But you must pay for the water.
Indiana Jones: Yes lord, anything
Greasy man: We will take one camel.
Indiana Jones: One camel, lord, I am honored.
Greasy man: And the woman.
Indiana Jones: And the woman?
Greasy man: Now go!
Indiana Jones: [stuttering] Lord, lord, no, I, I she is lazy. She is the worst of our kind. She is good for nothing. Lord, she brings my life nothing but misery.
Greasy man: [laughs] Then you will be happy to be rid of her.

Maya: [Indy has turned around to ride towards Maya] You're going the wrong way.
Indiana Jones: What happened? How did you get away from those Arabs?
Maya: Don't ask.

Maya: You know this is a very famous well.
Indiana Jones: I know. The well of Abraham. He was the father of the Jewish people.
Indiana Jones: Abraham was also the father of the Arab people.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Peking, March 1910 (#2.14)" (1993)

Li: [about the Great Wall of China] They say that in some places, a man died for every yard of the wall.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Wow. Must be the longest graveyard in the world.

Miss Seymour, Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Henry, have you learned the chronology of the dynasties yet?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: No... you know, Miss Seymour. I think it's more important to learn the language of a country than it is the history.
Miss Seymour: You mean you haven't learned them.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Mr. Li, what's the Chinese word for mother?
Li: Ma.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Hey, ma!
Anna Jones: Oh Henry, you know how much I dislike it when you call me that.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: It's Chinese.
Li: No, not quite. I'm afraid you called your gracious mother a horse.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Mom, am I gonna die like Suzy?
Anna Jones: Why Henry, of course not, your sister was very ill. And she was never very strong.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Now she's in heaven with grandpa.
Anna Jones: Hm-hm.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Am I gonna die and go to heaven?
Anna Jones: One day. But not yet.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [to his great-grandson Harry] You want to know something about cranberry sauce? When I was a little boy, I was in China.
Annie Jones: You were in China when you were a little boy?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Sure. I was just a little bit older than you are now.
Annie Jones: That must have been a long time ago.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [the family laughs politely] Yes, it was.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Well, long, long ago, in a far away land known as the Middle Kingdom, my father, your great great grandfather, was going to work in the great city of Peking, with the famous Chinese scholar and translator Yen Fu. My mother and my tutor, Miss Seymour were determined to see the sights of China. They thought I should see them too. I didn't mind that.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] My mother was quite a lady. After she send the landlord packing, she bought chickens for Huang Feng, and we had a grand dinner. I best believe that was the best Thanksgiving feast I ever attended.
Annie Jones: What's that got to do with cranberry sauce?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Not a lot. Here, Harry, why don't you try some. You'll probably find, like me, that you hate it.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Prague, August 1917 (#2.20)" (1993)

Shifty man: Well?
Indiana Jones: I hear the price of cabbage is high this year.
Shifty man: Not as high as the price of beats. Beats, they're outrageous.
Indiana Jones: On the other hand, carrots are a dime a dozen. I'd stock up on them if I were you.

Indiana Jones: I've been lighting matches out here for two hours. Haven't you seen me?
Shifty man: Of course not. I'm blind, you idiot.

Very Big Man - Ministery of Telephones: If the removal department had removed your phone, sir, there'd be a form accordingly and as you can see
[holds up an empty tray]
Very Big Man - Ministery of Telephones: there isn't one.
[taps the tray]
Very Big Man - Ministery of Telephones: So we can't have removed it. Naturally therefore, we can't replace it.
Indiana Jones: Perhaps someone removed it, but didn't fill out the form?
Very Big Man - Ministery of Telephones: In other words, a theft.

Indiana Jones: This is absolutely ridiculous. All I want is a new phone. I went to the ministry of phones and my form blew out the window. and then I went out onto the ledge and pidgeon knocked it into the street. and a man stepped on it. And then I had to chase after a tram and a woman hit me with her handbag and so I went to the police. They made me fill it out in German. And then they gave me the third degree and then they put me in jail.
Franz Kafka: What you're saying is, you're upset.
Indiana Jones: No, I'm not upset, I'm incandescent with rage!

Indiana Jones: Mr. Kafka, I'll never forget this.
Franz Kafka: Oh, you can even make bureaucracy interesting, if you have a little imagination.

The Prague Spy: All I can say is: if that telephone is not installed in the apartment first thing in the morning, I will have you shot as a traitor.
Indiana Jones: It will be.

Indiana Jones: I guess you'll connect it up now, right?
2nd Installer: Connect it up? To the wires you mean?
Indiana Jones: Well yeah, the wires.
1st Installer: Eh, we're telephone installers, eh, Mr. Shubelgruber.
2nd Installer: We wouldn't dream of connecting them.
1st Installer: No, that's eh...
2nd Installer: Connections.
1st Installer: Connections, that's right.
2nd Installer: Naturally.
1st Installer: Of course.
2nd Installer: That's an entirely different department.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Paris, September 1908 (#2.13)" (1993)

Pablo Picasso: Now for the final stage.
[throws away the canvas and puts a fresh one on the easle]
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Final stage?
Pablo Picasso: To get Degas right, you must do it as he does: from memory.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: When did you decide to become a painter?
Pablo Picasso: Most men, they have a choice. Become a banker, a lawyer, a tailor, a mechanic. Me, I have no choice. No true artist has choice. I must create in order to feel alive.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: But when you paint a wild horse, what does it look like?
Pablo Picasso: You might not see the horse, but you will certainly see the wildness.

Miss Seymour: You will not leave this room until you finish 'Les Miserables'.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Great title...

Auction Woman: Isn't she just perfect?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: It certainly is. I remember the day it was painted. This little masterpiece means a whole world to me. The truth is, it gave me a whole new understanding of art.
Auction Woman: Did you say you were there when he painted it?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Yes, I was.
Auction Woman: [sighs] That's really neat.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: See the date?
Auction Woman: Yeah.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: 1908. I was on a world lecture tour with mom and dad. My tutor Helen Seymour was in charge of me in Paris. That's what I let her think, anyway
[the woman laughs]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Back home Taft was elected president, and Jack Johnson was the first black boxing heavyweight champion. It was the beginning of a new century. The modern age was upon us. Paris was the city of art. And Miss Seymour was determined that I would see all of it.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I'm not sure if Picasso ever knew, but Degas was almost blind at the time. But Degas was a sly old fox, and I think he knew what was going on. So in the end, the joke was on Picasso.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Palestine, October 1917 (#2.21)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: [Maya takes off her veil] You are so beautiful.
Maya: I know.

Indiana Jones: It's good to see you, Ned.
T.E. Lawrence: You too. Though I'm shocked to find you so grown up. In my mind's eye you're still the little boy that I used to terrify with tales of mummies stalking the night.
Indiana Jones: They still scare me thanks to you.
T.E. Lawrence: Then I've done some good in the world.

Indiana Jones: Stay alive, Ned.
T.E. Lawrence: You too, Indy.

Maya: Do you intend to infuriate me this entire trip?
Indiana Jones: It's not my idea. Standard procedure.

Schiller: [to Rashid] Tell the Colonel what you told me.
Indiana Jones: Damn it, keep your mouth shut!
Schiller: [turns to Indy] It's too late, spy! You're little charade is now truly exposed
[slaps Rashid across the face]

Indiana Jones: Where have you been?
Rashid: Don't ask. Next time, you play the dead man!

Jack Anders: Well Henry, you kept your promise.
Indiana Jones: Yes. I guess we'll be in Jerusalem by Christmas.
Jack Anders: Can't think of a better place I'd rather be at that time.
Indiana Jones: Come on fellas, let's drink this place dry.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Barcelona, May 1917 (#2.4)" (1992)

Pablo Picasso: [Indy is getting reacquainted with Pablo Picasso] Don't tell me you're...
Indiana Jones: Yup!
Pablo Picasso: Norman! How's the painting coming along, huh?
[gives Indy a hug]
Indiana Jones: No, Norman Rockwell was another kid, I'm Indiana Jones.
Pablo Picasso: Ah, well, we can't all be talented.

Indiana Jones: Well, I just wondered if you wanted any help with...
Pablo Picasso: [grabs Indy by the lapels] Picasso wants help in painting? You think any pagan just walks in off the street to paint like Picasso paints?

Diaghilev: I need someone who knows how to stand still. Drop your trousers.
Indiana Jones: Now listen...
Diaghilev: I wish to look at your legs.

Indiana Jones: My name is Indiana Jones, Mr. Diaghilev.
Diaghilev: [chuckles] Don't be silly! That's not a Russian name.
Indiana Jones: Neither am I...
Diaghilev: Everybody in my ballet company is Russian, Igor.
Balet Dancer: He has English Russians...
Balet Dancer # 2: Italian Russians...
Balet Dancer # 3: And French Russians.
Diaghilev: You think I can afford to bring Russian Russians all the way from Russia?

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: This reminds me of the time that I was a spy in Spain during the first world war.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] I was stationed in the ancient seaport of Barcelona. You know, there's that lovely boulevard that leads down to the harbor, romantic cafes, you know, hidden behind shady vines. Amazing buildings by mad Spanish architects. What a place for a young man. And what a place for a spy. I tell you, Spain in World War One was every spy's dream. The entire anti German alliance worked as a team. There was Marcello, the Italian. He'd seen everything. There was Charles, a Frenchman, who used to be a tax inspector. There was Cunningham, the Englishman. In peace time, he wrote thrillers and in war time he acted them out. And there was me, the new boy on the block.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You may think we're right back where we started, but the crucial thing is: it was a jolly good effort!

Theatre Caretaker: Ah there you are, Professor Jones.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: That's me.
Theatre Caretaker: You're audience is waiting across the hall in lecture room 103.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: My audience?
Theatre Caretaker: Yes, the Pennsylvania History Society? This is the American Congress of Neurology.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Verdun, September 1916 (#1.4)" (1992)

Indiana Jones: So, we're fighting to protect Serbia, a tiny country no one's ever heard of. That's what this wars all about?

Indiana Jones: [narrating] Dear Ned. Interested to hear of your struggles against the Turks and Germans in the Middle-East. I'm in a place called Verdun. This trench warfare is hell. The men either run straight into machine gun fire, or wait for the next artillery barrage to drop on them. They're like animals being led to slaughter. And I can't understand. I can't understand why.

Businessman on Plane: Insurance.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: What, what?
Businessman on Plane: Seatbelts required by our insurance.
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You work for the airline?
Businessman on Plane: No. The airline works for me.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: What is it they call you, the pirate of Wall Street?
Businessman on Plane: I prefer 'acquisition specialist'.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I've flown this airline for fifty years.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You remind me of someone I met in the first world war. I enlisted in the Belgian army under an alias. They made me a courier and before I knew it, I was with the high command of the French second army. At Verdun, one of the worst battles of the war.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Well, the orders never got there and nobody ever found out what I did. The attack was delayed and ten thousand men lived a day longer. The French finally retook Fort Beaumond. There were twenty thousand casualties. As for General Petain, he hated politicians because he thought they had no concern for human life. But after the war, Petain became a politician himself and had a hard time indeed living up to his own moral code. Neville resigned and died a bitter old man. His problem was that he couldn't understand the consequences of his actions on the little guy. So, don't end up like him, bub.
[notices the Wall Street man has fallen asleep]

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Princeton, February 1916 (#2.6)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: Good afternoon, Mr. Stratemeyer. How's the new Tom Swift?
Edward Stratemeyer: Troublesome. I've got Tom stuck in an Incan tomb surrounded by Rocketrangers and his stungun doesn't work. The villain is flooding the tomb with water and I don't know how to get Tom out.

Butch: Hey, Soda-jerk, you're gonna drive that pile of junk to the prom?
[referring to Mr. Stratemeyer's Bugatti]
Indiana Jones: When we get this baby souped up it's gonna blow the doors off that tin lizzy.

Indiana Jones: [shouting] Are you crazy? We're not supposed to be here!
Nancy Stratemeyer: [whispering] I know that, so be quiet.
Indiana Jones: [still shouting] We could be shot!
Nancy Stratemeyer: You're such a ninny.

Indiana Jones: I think you'd better give us those plans back, sir.
Professor Thompson: You meddling little brats.

Indiana Jones: [having made a grand entrance at the junior prom] I love you, Nancy Stratemeyer.
[they kiss]

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Why do you need such big wheels?
Truck driver: Truth be told, ever since I was a teenager, I wanted to drive the hottest car in town. That was my teenage dream. Wasn't it yours?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You're right, it was.
[chuckles]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Yeah, 1916 was the year.
[dissolve into flashback]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I was living with my father in Princeton. It was spring and I was going to take Nancy Stratemeyer to the junior prom in her father's Bugatti.
[another chuckle]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: In those days regular high school kids simply didn't have cars, they only dreamt about them.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] Edison never did perfect that battery. I fulfilled my teenage dream. That day I had the hottest car in town!
Truck driver: Well, that's just about the tallest car tale I ever heard.
[laughs]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: And that's just about the tallest car I've ever seen!
Truck driver: Wanna go for a spin?

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Benares, January 1910 (#2.15)" (1993)

Jiddu Krishnamurthi: Would you like to play?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Sure. Wait a minute. I'm supposed to be studying.
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: So am I.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Great!

Jiddu Krishnamurthi: What is your name?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Well, my parents call me Henry, but you can call me Indy.
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: Jiddu Krishnamurthi. This is my brother, Jiddu Nitya.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You have the same first names?
[an Indian boy laughs]
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: Where are you from?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: New Jersey. I'm American.
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: Here we say the last names first.

Miss Seymour: You learned how to play cricket?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: The pitcher's called a bowler and a curve balls' called a googly
Miss Seymour: Well, you did learn some cricket. Perhaps the afternoon wasn't a waste after all.

Jiddu Krishnamurthi: I want you to think of something you want more than anything else in the world.
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I want... I want to live forever!
[they sit down under a tree]
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: But everybody has to die. You cannot live forever. How does that make you feel, Indy?
Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I feel sad, I guess.
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: That is the answer to your question. You see, people want things they cannot have and that makes them sad and they suffer.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [looking at a statue of Shiva] Why is he called the destroyer?
Jiddu Krishnamurthi: He sounds mean, doesn't he? But really, Shiva is a compasionate god, because in Hinduism, the destroyer of life is also the bringer of life. So what Shiva destroys, he renews and restores.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] Annie Besant continued to claim that Krishnamurti was the new world teacher.
[cut back to old Indy at the truck stop]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: But, in 1929 in front of three thousand members of the society, Krishnamurti renounced his membership. For the next 50 years, he gave talks all over the world telling people that God is in all of us and that above all else, we should be kind to one another. Just something to think about.
[gets up to leave]
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: See you later!
Trucker: [baffled] Yeah, see you later.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: British East Africa, September 1909 (#1.3)" (1992)

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I hate snakes!

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I'm sorry!
Professor Henry Jones, Sr.: So you should be. You are going straight to bed. And no supper for you, my lad.

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You see, all the plants and animals, they're, they're connected. When something happens to one animal, it causes something different to happen to all the other animals.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: This was a land I'd read about in adventure books, but what I saw was different. I didn't know it then, but I was looking at the Garden of Eden, before the fall of man.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I remember that there was a time when to shoot an animal was an act of conservation.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: You know, some years later they named that place Champagne Ridge. Oh, not in memory of Roosevelt, but in memory of the thousands who followed after him.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Istanbul, September 1918 (#2.17)" (1993)

Indiana Jones: Have you ever known me to lose a bet?
Stefan: Ankara. But you would never admit it.

Stefan: Henry, be careful.
Indiana Jones: Aren't I always?
Stefan: No. I would say... not always.
[Indy opens the door, only to catch their assistant eavesdropping]

Mustafa Kemal: Mr. Anderson, if that is your name, which I doubt. You may have been led to believe that all Turks can be bribed, but I can assure you, that is not true.
Indiana Jones: [posing as journalist Nils Anderson] Sir, I'm sure that there is room for negotiation. If, if you were to make a seperate peace, it would at least save lives...
Mustafa Kemal: These people are not interested in that, they're like vultures. Feeding on the dying carcas of the Otoman Empire. The Empire is dying, but this nation is not. It will not die as long as I live.

Molly: Did you tell me anything that was true?
Indiana Jones: Yes Molly. Molly, I told you that I loved you! You know that's true!
Molly: Do I? You think you can just take the disguise off and say: look, I know you loved Nils Anderson, but I'm, I'm someone quite different. I'm me, love me instead?

Indiana Jones: When I was fighting in the trenches I saw thousands of people killed for nothing. A lot of them were my friends. If I succeeded in shortening this war, even by a day, I save thousands of lives. I thought I could do that without hurting you.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Somme, Early August 1916 (#2.2)" (1992)

Indiana Jones: Were still too far away, We'll never make it!
Lieutenant Moreau: Don't tell me what we can't do, tell me what we can!

Indiana Jones: If you're so cynical about the war, why do you keep on fighting?
Sassoon: Because it's my duty.

Indiana Jones: You didn't kill Captain Cote, did you?
Jacques: No, but that doesn't mean we are friends.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [grabbing a rude donut salesman by the neck with his eaglehead cane] If you'll apologize to the nice lady right now, I'll reconsider turning your head into a sausage piza!
Tom at Donut Shop: Hey hey, mister, don't hurt me, please don't hurt me. I've had it tougher than any of my friends, ok, this is hard work. It's tougher than you know...
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Listen, bonzo-brain, you don't know what tough is! When I was your age, I was fighting in the Great War. In the most horrendous hell-pitt ever deviled by man or the devil!

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I thought the world had ended. Great men died that day. And I saw myself spending the greater part of my youth in some rat invested gap, so don't talk to me about tough!
Policeman #1: What's going on here?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I'm was only trying to tell the lad a story.
Tom at Donut Shop: He assaulted me, man! Take him in!
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I did not!
Policeman #1: I'm afraid that's what it looks like.

---

The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Attack of the Hawkmen (1995) (TV)

Indiana Jones: What's so funny?
Len: Well you see the longest any reconnaissance guy ever lasted with us is eight days.
Indiana Jones: Why is that?
Len: Well, you fly in low and slow and you got a camera in your hand when what you need is a gun.
Hobie: Hey dog breath, give him a break.
Len: The kid ought to know, right?

Indiana Jones: [a German plane has just dropped a message in a canister] It's from Richthofen.
Hobie: How do you know?
Indiana Jones: I had lunch with him.

Francois: [opening a specially prepared suitcase] Ehm, It is a fitted suitcase, hm? Hairbrush, razor, hair oil.
Indiana Jones: Oh, I, I, I never use hair oil.
Francois: It is not hair oil. It is invisible ink.

Indiana Jones: What is this?
Charles Nungesser: It's the parachute.
Indiana Jones: A parachute? What's it for?
Charles Nungesser: Didn't they tell you? That is how our spies are dropped behind enemy lines
Indiana Jones: What?
Charles Nungesser: You jump out of the airplane with it.
Indiana Jones: I'm not gonna ...
Charles Nungesser: It's the latest experimental model. Small enough to wear on your back. Now. Just climb aboard and sit down.
Indiana Jones: I have a bad feeling about this.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Paris, May 1919 (#2.18)" (1993)

T.E. Lawrence: Henry, don't forget me.
Indiana Jones: I won't.
T.E. Lawrence: Will you write?
Indiana Jones: I will.
T.E. Lawrence: We gave the old men victory and they threw it away, we offered them a new world and they made the old one over again. Still, it might have been worse.
Indiana Jones: What?
T.E. Lawrence: I said, might have been worse!

Gertrude Bell: You're going to be a diplomat?
Indiana Jones: Maybe.
T.E. Lawrence: Oh Henry, beware. The snares and delusions of diplomacy are not to be embraced lightly.

Arnold Toynbee: Yes... this idea of a commission?
T.E. Lawrence: Oh, who cares about a tuppenny ha'penny commission?
Indiana Jones: The President does.

Indiana Jones: This war had to be fought. Above all it had to be won. The alternative was unthinkable.
T.E. Lawrence: Hm. Who said that?
Indiana Jones: You did.
T.E. Lawrence: I did?
Indiana Jones: In a letter you once wrote to me.
T.E. Lawrence: Oh yes, it's a long time ago.

---

Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine (1999) (VG)

Indiana Jones: My trusted law firm: Smith and Wesson.

Indiana Jones: Now where'd that Commie rat scurry off to?

[first lines]
Indiana Jones: Time to go to work.

---

"The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles: Florence, May 1908 (#2.19)" (1993)

Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: All objects attract because of gravity.

Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [narrating] My father was on a world lecture tour. He took the family and my tutor to Florence. Florence, Italy, the most romantic city where everyone was in love with someone, or maybe just in love with love.

Mimi: [moved to tears by Indy's story] Did she ever see him again?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: No, I don't think so.
Mimi: Did he write any more music?
Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Oh, yes. 'La Fanciulla Del West'. An opera about an American woman of the old west who gives up her home and friends for the man she loves.

---

The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Treasure of the Peacock's Eye (1995) (TV)

Bronislaw Malinowski: Kanoo, break through your sea passage, fly through peril, leave your imprint in the sand. Perhaps we'll meet again.
Young Indiana Jones: I hope so.

---