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: [about getting shot
] In your defense, a moving target is harder to hit. Eve
: Then you'd better keep moving.
: [last line before opening credits
] Take the bloody shot! Eve
: Agent down.
: [watches Bond shave
] Cut-throat razor. How very traditional. James Bond
: Well, I like to do some things the old-fashioned way. Eve
: Sometimes the old ways are the best.
: You know, Mallory's not as bad as you think. James Bond
: He's a bureaucrat. Eve
: You should do your homework. Gareth Mallory was a Lieutenant Colonel... James Bond
: Lieutenant Colonel in Northern Ireland. Hereford Regiment. Spent three months at the hands of the IRA. Eve
: So there's more to him than meets the eye.
[Bond is gifted the porcelain bulldog
: I think she was encouraging you to take a desk job. James Bond
: Just the opposite.
: She's ready for you. James Bond
: I'm sorry, have we met before? Eve
: I'm the one who should say sorry. James Bond
: It was only four ribs. Some of the less vital organs. Nothing major.
: Not enough excitement in Istanbul? Eve
: I've been reassigned. Temporary suspension from field work. James Bond
: Really? Eve
: Mmm. Something to do with killing 007. James Bond
: Well, you gave it your best shot. Eve
: That was hardly my best shot. James Bond
: I'm not sure I could survive your best. Eve
: I doubt you'll get the chance.
: [a mirror on Land Rover's right door falls
] That's all right. You weren't using it. Eve
: [makes left mirror fall
] I wasn't using that one, either.
: [via Eve's earpiece
] What was that? Eve
: VW Beetles... I think.
: She's pretty. James Bond
: Now, now. Eve
: If you like that sort of thing. James Bond
: I'll keep you posted.
[puts his earpiece into her glass
: [to Bond
] Keep still. This is the tricky part. Now, that's better.
: You look beautiful in that dress. Eve
: You don't scrub up so bad yourself. James Bond
: Well, its amazing what one can do with an extra pair of hands.
: Do you gamble? Eve
: I like a little flutter, now and then. Who doesn't like to take chances?
: You know, we've never formerly been introduced. Eve
: Oh? Well, my name's Eve. Eve Moneypenny. James Bond
: Well I look forward to our time together, Miss Moneypenny. Eve
: Me too. I'm sure we'll have one or two close shaves.
: I really have to note your qualifications. Cooper
: Height: six foot two and a half. 184 pounds. Trophies for karate and judo, holder of the Kama Sutra black belt. Miss Moneypenny
: Very impressive. How do you spell that? Cooper
: I'll show you!
: [taking the reins of the British Secret Service
] Oh, by the way, Moneypenny, since I've come in here, have you heard me stammer? Miss Moneypenny
: No, sir! Sir James
: Splendid. Let me know if I do; I haven't got time for that sort of thing now.
: Ah, this is where you come in Moneypenny. I want you to go through all the Auxiliary Files. Miss Moneypenny
: The lot, sir? It'll take all night. Sir James
: Your mother did some of her best work at night.
: Good lord! Moneypenny, you haven't changed a bit.
] Miss Moneypenny
: Actually, I'm Miss Moneypenny's daughter. Sir James
: How is your dear mother?
: [Kissing on a bed
] And what is your name? Cooper
: Cooper, big eyes; but, don't be formal, call me Coop. Miss Moneypenny
: It sounds like something for keeping birds. Cooper
: That's me!
: From now on, all remaining agents and trainees will be known as James Bond 007, including the girls. Cooper
: Won't that be rather confusing, sir? Sir James
: Exactly! The enemy won't know which way to turn. You are now, James Bond. Miss Moneypenny
: Congratulations, 007. Cooper
: And you, 007, sir. Sir James
: Good hunting, 007!
: No one can be such a perverse idiot as to assault a Customs official. It must be deliberate. Miss Moneypenny
: It may just be natural talent, sir.
: I must say, this place brings back a few memories. Miss Moneypenny
: Yes. Mother told me some of them. Sir James
: [Opens liquor cabinet
] She probably also told you that I'm partial to jasmine tea. Miss Moneypenny
: [Writes it down
] Jasmine tea, sir.
: Eh, wIll you be needing me tonight, sir? Sir James
: Very probably.
: You know, this sort of behaviour could qualify as sexual harassment. James Bond
: Really. What's the penalty for that? Miss Moneypenny
: Someday, you'll have to make good on your innuendos.
: Hmm, never seen you after hours, Moneypenny... lovely. Miss Moneypenny
: Thank you, James. James Bond
: Out on some kind of fashion assignment, dressing to kill? Miss Moneypenny
: I know you'll find this crushing, 007, but I don't sit at home every night praying for some international incident so I can run down here all dressed up to impress James Bond. I was on a date, if you must know, with a gentlemen. We went to the theater together. James Bond
: Moneypenny, I'm devastated.
: M authorizes you to observe Miss Onatopp but stipulates no - contact without prior approval. End transmission, Moneypenny. Good night, James. I trust you'll stay - Onatopp of things.
: What would I ever do without you? Miss Moneypenny
: As far as I can remember, James, you've never had me. James Bond
: Hope springs eternal.
: After you, Moneypenny. Miss Moneypenny
: No, I insist. You first.
: Miss Moneypenny, have you checked with communications? Moneypenny
: Well, replies to our Cairo, Amsterdam and Madrid inquiries - all negative, sir. M
: The PM wants to be informed personally when we find 007.
: James! Where have you been? James Bond
: Much too far from you, darling. Moneypenny
: Oh, same old James.
[James puts his hands on Moneypenny's behind
: Only more so! Heartless, brute! Letting me pine away without even a postcard. James Bond
: Pine no more. Cocktails at my place, eightish. Just the two of us. Moneypenny
: Aw, I'd adore that. If only I could trust myself. James Bond
: Same old Moneypenny. Britain's last line of defense.
: That was a quick conference. How do you expect a girl to keep herself alluring... James Bond
: Take a memo, please, Moneypenny. Moneypenny
: Ready, James. James Bond
: Sir, I have the honor to request you will accept my resignation, effective forthwith. Moneypenny
: Resignation from what? James Bond
: Her Majesty's Secret Service. And kindly present it to that monument in there.
: Moneypenny, what would I do without you? Moneypenny
: My problem is that you never do anything with me.
] Submarine Captain
: Dinghy's on board, sir. M
: [referring to Bond in the dinghy
] Tell him to come below and report. MoneyPenny
: It'll be a pleasure, sir.
: [buzzing intercom
] Miss Moneypenny, give 007 the password we've agreed with Japanese S.I.S. MoneyPenny
: Yes sir.
: We tried to think of something that you wouldn't forget. James Bond
: Yes? MoneyPenny
: "I, love, you". Repeat it please, to make sure you get it James Bond
: Don't worry, I get it.
: Hello, Penny. MoneyPenny
: You better go right in. You're late, as usual - even from your own funeral. James Bond
: Well, we corpses have absolutely no sense of timing.
: Oh, by the way, how was the girl? James Bond
: Which girl? MoneyPenny
: The Chinese one we fixed you up with. James Bond
: Oh, another five minutes, I'd have found out. MoneyPenny
: She'll never know what she missed.
[hands Bond effects from Skyfall
] Eve Moneypenny
: You've got a secret. Something you can't tell anyone, because you don't trust anyone.
: So what's going on, James? They say that Mexico was a step too far, that you're finished. James Bond
: And what do you think? Eve Moneypenny
: I think you're just getting started.
: [over the phone
] Who was that? Eve Moneypenny
: He's just a friend. James Bond
: At this hour of the night? Eve Moneypenny
: It's called life, James. You should try it some time.
: What's that? Eve Moneypenny
: [hiding a palmtop from James Bond
] Just a gift. From an admirer. M
: It's not your birthday, is it? Eve Moneypenny
[M walks out the door
] Eve Moneypenny
: That was last week.
: In the conference room - something pretty big; every double-o man in Europe has been rushed in. And the Home Secretary, too! James Bond
: His wife probably lost her dog.
: James, how else will you recognize her? James Bond
: Can't miss. She has two moles on her left thigh.
: [Talking on the phone
] Moneypenny, next time I see you, I'll put you across my knee. Miss Moneypenny
: On yogurt and lemon juice? Ha-ha. I can hardly wait!
: [Looking at a photograph
] A smashing figure! I don't suppose that has anything to do with your request. Bond
: Was there ever a man more misunderstood. Miss Moneypenny
: Now, James, you can't pull the wool over my eyes. You may be able to con the old man, but, I know better.
: [Bond says goodbye in Danish to Moneypenny on the phone while making love to his language tutor
] Goodbye my sweet. Moneypenny
: You always were a cunning linguist, James. Moneypenny
: [M walks up from behind Moneypenny
] Don't ask. M
: Don't tell.
: I believe you once had a relationship with Carver's wife, Paris. James Bond
: That was a long time ago, M... before she was married. I didn't realize it was public knowledge. Moneypenny
: Queen and country, James. M
: Your job is to find out whether Carver or someone in his organization sent that ship off course, and why. Use your relationship with Mrs. Carver, if necessary. James Bond
: I doubt if she'll remember me. M
: Remind her. Then pump her for information. Moneypenny
: You'll just have to decide how much pumping is needed, James. James Bond
: If only that were true of you and I, Moneypenny.
: [Calling on the phone
] James? Where are you? James Bond
: [In bed with a Danish Professor
] Oh, Moneypenny. Um. I'm just up here at Oxford, brushing up on a little Danish. Professor Inga Bergstrom
: Little? Moneypenny
: I'm afraid you're going to have to kiss off your lesson, James. We've got a situation here at the Ministry of Defense. We're sending the fleet to China.
: Keep this between ourselves. Miss Moneypenny
: That girl must be very talented. James Bond
: Believe me, my interest in her is purely professional.
: Una Yakov. Confirmed kills - 3. Probable kills - 2. Assassination methods - strangulation with hands or thighs. Miss Moneypenny
: Why, James, she's just your type. James Bond
: Wrong again, Moneypenny. You are. Miss Moneypenny
: I'll file that with the other secret information around here.
: Moneypenny, be a dear, ask Records to monitor Czech publications and news services, see if they can find any mention of a woman cellist at a conservatory in Bratislava. Miss Moneypenny
: I didn't know you were such a music lover, James. Anytime you want to drop by and listen to my Barry Manilow collection -
[Bond pats Moneypenny on the behind twice and leaves
: Well, I must say you've become more beautiful everyday. Miss Moneypenny
: *I'm* over here. James Bond
: Oh, of course you are. Miss Moneypenny
: And this is Miss Penelope Smallbone - my new assistant.
: What can I say Miss Moneypenny, except to say that she is - as attractive and, eh, - as charming... Miss Moneypenny
: As I used to be? James Bond
: I didn't say that. Miss Moneypenny
: You're such a flatter, James. James Bond
: Oh, Moneypenny, you know there never has been and - there never will be anybody but you. Miss Moneypenny
: So, you've told me.
: Welcome to universal exports.
[Bond gives Miss Smallbone a bouquet of red carnations
] Miss Moneypenny
: Take it dear, that's all you'll ever get from him. Penelope Smallbone
: Thank you, Commander Bond. James Bond
: You know me? Penelope Smallbone
: Miss Moneypenny described you. Miss Moneypenny
: In nauseating detail. James Bond
: James! But, why are you so late? James Bond
: I fell out of an airplane without a parachute. Who's in there? Miss Moneypenny
: Q and the Minister of Defense. James Bond
: You don't believe me do you? Miss Moneypenny
: No. And you should go right in.
: Why James, you look like you've just fallen off a mountain. James Bond
: Funny you should say that, Moneypenny, actually I was in a cable car. It doesn't matter.
: Moneypenny - Fairbanks. Moneypenny
: Alaska? James Bond
: No, Bill Fairbanks, 002. Moneypenny
] Oh, poor Bill. I miss him. James Bond
: Yeah, well the man with the golden gun didn't. Moneypenny
: Officially that was never confirmed. James Bond
: Where was 002 when it happened? Moneypenny
: Beirut. '69. In a cabaret with a lady called Saida
: Moneypenny, you are better than a computer. Moneypenny
: In all sorts of ways! But, you never take advantage of them.
: Have you got an assignment, James? James Bond
: Yes, Moneypenny. I'm to eliminate all free radicals. Miss Moneypenny
: Ooh. Do be careful.
: Still here, Moneypenny? You should be in bed. Miss Moneypenny
: James, we *both* should be!
: James! Have you brought me a souvenir from your trip? Chocolates? An engagement ring? James Bond
: I thought you might enjoy one of these.
[gives Ms. Moneypenny a cigar tube
] Ms. Moneypenny
: How romantic. I know exactly where to put that.
[throws the cigar tube in the garbage
] James Bond
: Oh Moneypenny, the story of our relationship: close, but no cigar.
: [Reading Bond's medical report
] I see the good doctor has cleared you. Notes you have exceptional stamina. Ms. Moneypenny
: I'm sure she was touched by his dedication
[walks toward Dr. Molly Warrmflash
] Ms. Moneypenny
: to the job in hand.
: [At a horse race
] Come on Fluke! Get a wiggle on!
] Once more into the breach, dear friends. Miss Moneypenny
: And one plane ticket, lucky man. I've never been to Istanbul. James Bond
: You've never been to Istanbul? Where the moonlight on the Bosphorus is irresistible. Miss Moneypenny
: Maybe I should get you to take me there someday. I've tried everything else. James Bond
: Darling, Moneypenny, you know I've never even looked at another woman. Miss Moneypenny
: Oh, really James? James Bond
: Let me tell you the secret of the world...
[Interrupted by M
: Anyone seeing you in that outfit, Moneypenny, would most certainly be discouraged from leaving the country. What can I bring you back from Holland? Miss Moneypenny
: A diamond? In a ring? James Bond
: Would you settle for a tulip? Miss Moneypenny
: [Bond leaves; she sighs longingly
: What do you know about gold, Moneypenny? Miss Moneypenny
: Oh, the only gold I know about is the kind you wear... you know, on the third finger of your left hand? James Bond
: Hmm, one of these days we really must look into that. Miss Moneypenny
: What about tonight? You'll come over for dinner...
[playfully tosses Bond's hat onto the hat rack
] Miss Moneypenny
: and I'll cook you a wonderful angel cake. James Bond
: Well, nothing would give me greater pleasure, but unfortunately I do have a... business appointment. Miss Moneypenny
: That's the flimsiest excuse you've ever given me. Oh, well, some girls have all the luck. Who is she, James? M
: [over intercom
] "She" is me, Miss Moneypenny. And kindly omit the customary byplay with 007. He's dining with me and I don't want him to be late. Miss Moneypenny
: [to Bond
] So there's hope for me yet. James Bond
: [gives Moneypenny a playful peck on the cheek
] Moneypenny, won't you ever believe me?
: James! Where have you been? I've been searching all over London for you.
[Picks up phone
] Miss Moneypenny
: 007 is here sir.
[Slaps Bond's hand away from the papers on her desk
] James Bond
: Moneypenny! What gives? Miss Moneypenny
: Me, given an ounce of encouragement. You've never taken me to dinner looking like this. You've never taken me to dinner... James Bond
: I would, you know. Only "M" would have me court-martialed for... illegal use of government property. Miss Moneypenny
: Flattery will get you nowhere - but don't stop trying.
: [Moneypenny is typing a disinformative newspaper report in her office, when 007 walks in
] James! James Bond
[Bond and Moneypenny embrace and kiss. Bond lays Moneypenny out on her desk
] Miss Moneypenny
: Oh, James...
[Continue kissing, when all of a sudden...
: [walking in
[Moneypenny sits up abruptly and removes a pair of virtual reality simulation centre glasses
] Miss Moneypenny
: Um... I was... um... just testing it out.
[She blushes and buttons her blouse
: Oh, it's rather hard, isn't it? Miss Moneypenny
: Yes... very...
: James! James Bond
: Moneypenny, a feast for my eyes! Miss Moneypenny
: What about the rest of you? James Bond
: Well, I was going to get around to that.
: Miss Moneypenny, thank you. Moneypenny
: Goodbye, James. Or, should I say - Ciao, bello!
: Moneypenny, where's 007? Moneypenny
: He's on a mission sir. In Austria. M
: Well, tell him to pull out. Immediately.
[scene cuts to Bond making love to a woman